Eat My Sports: You can’t spell ‘trade bust’ without CC Sabathia

Have any of you ever watched LOST? If you have, you know that each season has it’s bust episode. The one where the previous week had a preview that looked so good that you actually thought you had a reason to believe SOMETHING might be explained. Or, at least have the juiciest episode of the season (i.e. the possibility of Claire and Kate making out). Then, you watch the episode, and nothing. No island explanation, no Claire and Kate making out, no awkward man hugs between Sawyer and Jack, nothing. Why? because there was no substance to it and everything you thought was going to be going into the episode ended up being nothing more than commercial filler. Welcome to the CC “Music Factory” Sabathia trade to the Milwaukee Brewers!

Yes Brewtown, a 6-foot 7-inch, 290-pound pitcher with a 6-8 record and a 3.83 ERA is the answer to your postseason drought since 1982. For the record, SG faithful, only one Guy was even alive the last time the Brewers were in October ball, and that’s five trivia points if you guessed old-timer Rick Snee. Sabathia’s eight year tenure with the Cleveland “Rick Wild Thing Vaughn” Indians was above average, but never anything special. Don’t believe me? See for yourself. 1,979 baserunners in 1,528.2 innings of work, a lifetime 3.83 ERA and a hefty appetite for a hot pink haircut, wait, that was C.C. DeVille, my bad.

I mean don’t get me wrong, I love the upcoming punchlines of Sabathia and Prinze Fielder at team buffets, but this trade, and the ongoing hype makes no sense. Simply by adding a moderate pitcher, who had one great year to your lineup, does not automatically make you a World Series contender. The Brewers are already looking up at both the Cardinals and Cubs in the NL Central, and bringing in a pitcher who has a dynamite fastball, but can’t figure out how to operate this season, doesn’t solve your problems.

The Brewers traded four prospects to Cleveland for this guy, and with the looming free agency of Ben Sheets, the Brewers may have just mortgaged their future only to finish on the outside of the playoffs yet again. LOST.

Top five things that annoy me in sports this week:
5. Playoff guarantee from the Buffalo Bills

The last time you guys were in, Creed and blonde tips for men were both en vogue. I don’t see any of these three making a comeback.
4. Ron Artest
When are you going to drop another rap album on us, big guy?
3. Possibility of the Steelers ownership changing hands
If I find one bottle of ketchup behind this story ….
2. Rafael Nadal
Anyone else see him biting the Wimbledon trophy? Creepy.
1. Roger Federer
Nice Mr. Rogers sweater in defeat. Creepier.