Ah, yes, January. The time where every news or sports-affiliated program recaps the year that was, all while making bold predictions about the year to come, most of which will never happen. I’m not here to do any top-10s or even go over the most important event s of the year, I’m just here to give my biased sports opinion on the year that was. So, in case you were busy trying to get a pants on the ground massage from a former Jets employee, odds are, you missed it.
Favre from over
In the story that has really never ended since about 2005, Brett Favre and his texting penis came back for one final NFL season after last year’s debacle in the Superdome. In his final comeback, Favre would spend more time on the sidelines and in the commissioner’s office than actually playing on the field. And in leaving no stone unturned, when Favre left, thanks to TMZ, we now have seen literally all he has to offer.
A dull roar
In a year that scandals defined the athlete, Tiger Woods came back from his wife beating the crap out of him, to the PGA Tour. Woods, who had been defined by being unshakable and his cursing on the course, never finished higher than fourth in any event, and requests that you please remove your name from your cell phone greeting so that it just shows up as a number.
I’m gonna take my talents to South Beach
Self-serving athletes pretty much defined 2010, and none more so than LeBron James’ ego-filled one hour special on ESPN, dubbed “The Decision.” “The Douche” ripped out his hometown’s heart on national television in a contrived, poor excuse for journalism interview by Jim Gray, who by the way, is not even employed by ESPN. While James became the nation’s most vilified athlete, at least he left us with a great quote to excuse ourselves when going to the bathroom.
Yes, UCONN
The UCONN women’s basketball team eclipsed John Wooden’s record for most consecutive victories in college basketball. And like most of the rest of you, I didn’t care either.
No longer the ‘Aints
In the battle for the biggest forehead in the NFL, Drew Brees out-dueled Peyton Manning to lead the Saints to their first NFL title. What was remarkable was that the Saints accomplished this just a mere five years after Kanye West said President Bush didn’t like black people.
Queensbridge!
Ron Artest’s crazy ass finally won an NBA Championship as the Los Angeles Lakers fought the Boston Celtics and had the title come down to an epic game seven. To celebrate, Artest rushed the stands to punch somebody.