Imagine pairing her with bathwater and a baby

Secret passages are funny. Whether they’re activated by a random candelabra near a bookshelf, behind a floor of stairs, entered via dumb waiter or just located right in front of you on a wall, they’re full of wonder and whimsy. Except, they tend to be one-way affairs.

Take for instance a trash chute. It’s like a secret passage: it’s located in a wall, it can almost be navigated by a person and it leads one way. Now, whether that one way leads to a trash compactor, a furnace, an open dumpster full of syringes used by victims of ass-mumps or a room full of water, garbage and a one-eyed space beast, well, that’s up to the owners of the residence.

So, it would be smart to be extra careful when around a trash chute, especially if delicate and expensive devices are in hand. Right Amanda Still?