With the presidential election only two and a half years away (seriously, news networks?), things are getting tense. We know who the Democrats will be running, but who is going to represent the Republicans? Perhaps Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey.
He’s 45, he lives in Florida, he recently joined the GOP after a stint as an independent, and oh yeah, he claims to be a vampire, just ask his 19-year-old fiancee, an Ohio native he met online. His platform: um, he’s apparently a descendant of Vlad the Impaler, was engaged to a 16-year-old Minnesota girl last month, but they now have a restraining order on him, and he also has a bit of history with the law, including the Secret Service are monitoring him.
Key quote: “I haven’t dated a girl older than 19 since 2006,” said the Tampa man as his 19-year-old daughter and his 2-year-old grandson met him at the Greyhound station. “It’s good to be me.”
(Thanks Dave)