Anchorman is a movie that’s special to SeriouslyGuys. Many a Friday and Saturday night in Radford would be spent with at least the four of us, if not the extended SeriouslyFamily, coming back from our favorite bar (BT’s ’til we D.I.E) and relaxing with the movie. Mind you, many a Friday and Saturday evening in Radford would be spent with the four of us standing around in the bar, quoting the entire verbatim. It just resonates with us.
And since this week, SG is celebrating its four year anniversary, we here thought that it might be good to reflect on the movie. We’re not necessarily the self-congratulating type of people (we’d much rather tell you that we’re good and have you believe us, rather than come up with something in order to fulfill that prophecy), but instead, we just wanted to give you all a peek into what makes us tick and where our roots lie-large conch shells. And so, I give you four perspectives on Anchorman and why we love it. Enjoy.
Bryan Schools: To this day I am ashamed of myself for not seeing Anchorman in theaters, and that the Human Torch was denied a bank loan. Being my favorite film, I definitely should have, but I’m not crying myself to sleep at night because I didn’t. Some films you can tell without even seeing them that they are truly special, which is why I did not hesitate to purchase it on DVD the day it came out. It was the 2004 winter break for Radford, so basically I had nothing but time on my hands and went over to a friend’s place for booze and to watch the movie on his dad’s big screen. I largely ignored everything (as I was more concerned with Jack Daniels than the movie) until I literally spit out my drink when Ron Burgundy spilled out “a whale’s vagina.” That did it, comedic gold, the kind of moment that is priceless. At that moment I didn’t care if the movie had cost me $500, it was worth it.
Over the second semester of our senior year at Radford, we watched Anchorman no less than six times a week. I know you think that I’m joking, but trust me, I’m not. Total over a five year time-span, it is more than likely that I have seen the movie over 250 times. We were so well-versed in Burgundyisms that Bryan McBournie and I actually quoted the movie from start to finish during our graduation ceremony that May. But why? What made the movie special? Perhaps what makes the movie so incredible is that we cannot identify one single thing that makes the movie amazing. It could be Burgundy’s search for Rome, Brian Fantana’s army of colognes, or perhaps the deity that is St. Dorothy Mantooth. It’s a melting pot of perfect timing and no one person trying to overdo their role.
When it comes down to it though, in order for you to love something, like lamp, bottom line is you have to identify. Every time I watch the movie I see parts of myself in Burgundy and Fantana, same for McBournie and Rick Snee. Brick Tamland is completely (minus being what some people call mentally retarded) Chris Taylor and my buddy Paul. Hell, even my fiancee is a dead ringer for Veronica Corningstone. Not to sound corny, but every time I watch that movie, either alone or with people, it’s like I’m watching it with all of them, because of the bond we share and the characters being almost portraits of ourselves. The term “masterpiece” gets thrown around a lot, and rarely is it ever earned, but for all the criteria I have for naming a movie truly unique (New York), Anchorman is as classy as it gets.
Go #### yourselves SeriouslyReaders.
Bryan McBournie: I didn’t like Anchorman the first time I saw it. It was the summer of 2004, right before my senior year of college. I saw it in a movie theater in Saratoga Springs, New York. I wasn’t ready for it, I didn’t get a lot of the references. Sure, it was amusing, but it was nothing special. I was wrong. I later found out that the real problem was that I was sober.
Some people became reporters after seeing All the President’s Men, I wanted to be a reporter after I saw Anchorman, drunk, after a night out at the bar. I didn’t want to wear suits that made me look like a bellhop, I just wanted to work in that sort of an atmosphere, where partying happened often, and occasionally work done.
Anchorman was always great for quotes with friends, especially if you could make them fit into an awkward situation. I even tried using the whole women’s lib angle on it when trying to pick up a girl once. It didn’t work.
Rick Snee: The problem with writing a retrospective about Anchorman is that, for all the times I’ve seen it, I’ve been blackout drunk almost every. single. time. I believe I saw the ending once, but I’m pretty sure I made the whole thing up, whether in a bathroom floor dream or as a hallucination my brain made up to defend itself from total whiskey failure. (Did it really end with pandas? Nah, there’s no f**king way.)
I’ll put it this way: I didn’t see Casablanca until, like, 2003. Or Gone with the Wind until 2006. But I could discuss those movies convincingly because they’ve been quoted or referenced so often that I could get the gist of the original work. I could quote these movies the same way an illiterate can quote the Bible: by repeating whatever Rick Warren or Pat Robertson says.
So, up until the sex sequence with unicorns and the world’s most beautiful rainbow, I can recall most of the movie. But, thanks to my friends, especially The Guys, I can cogently discuss the whole thing like a Will Ferrell scholar.
As embarrassing as all that was to admit, it’s even more embarrassing that I have fuller recollections of Ricky Bobby, Jackie Moon and Elf than I do of Anchorman. But, I think I love it?
Chris Taylor: There’s something magical about Anchorman. Sure, it’s a whimsically charming movie that’s even funnier when you watch the unrated version versus the one released in theaters (believe me, it’s the only way to figure out what a chocolate-covered squirrel is), but more than that, it helped to turn us into us. As was mentioned in the opening, it was a movie that bonded and melded the guys into what we are today. Combine those two and what you see on this site is a loving homage to the movie.
As Schools mentioned, our group of friends/clique from college was influenced by the main characters. As McBournie mentioned, it’s influenced how we’d like to dress-stylish, fashionable and with really good hair. As Rick mentioned, it influenced our line of quotes. Yeah, anyone can quote The Godfather II or Star Wars, but how many of you know each and every single exclamatory cry that Ron Burgundy utters in the movie? We do.
As for me, I like the movie because of what it is. It’s not a series of random skits that are pieced together to create a story, rather it’s a story with random and audacious scenes and lines that blend together to make a complete comedy. The jury’s still out on whether Jack Black or Ben Stiller gives the better cameo in the movie, but the verdict is definitely in on one thing: sixty percent of the time, SeriouslyGuys loves Anchorman every time.
Also, milk was a bad choice.
YOU SCORPION WOMAN!