MasterChugs Theater: ‘Fast Five’

When Fast & Furious opened in April 2009 to a surprising $71 million and rescued the Fast/Furious franchise from the dead by reuniting the original cast, you just knew the studio and filmmakers would take a victory lap in the form of a fifth movie. But the amazing thing about Fast Five is that it plays less like a creatively bankrupt money-grab sequel, and more like a firing-on-all-cylinders first movie in an all-new franchise. Action junkies and car chase lovers, take note. The summer movie season is off to a start. Not necessarily a great start, but a good enough start.

On the run in Rio, with federal agents hot on their pursuit, Dom (Vin Diesel) and Brian (Paul Walker) decide to reunite their cohorts to pull off the proverbial one last score. The job? Steal $100 million from a drug lord’s giant 800-lb safe in a police station full of corrupt cops. The plot is basically Ocean’s Eleven, but with cars. The script is serviceable, as writer Chris Morgan doesn’t try to reinvent the wheel, and director Justin Lin keeps the pace fast and, well, furious. Yes, I just did that. It all leads up to Dom and Brian driving around Rio with that giant safe being pulled behind them, destroying every inch of car, building, and street around them. It’s one heck of an action sequence, expertly blending in-camera and CGI effects shots with impressive stunt driving.

Adding The Rock, aka, Dwayne Johnson as the bad-ass fed out to catch Dom and Brian no matter what was a brilliant masterstroke. He owns the screen from the first second and acts like it’s his movie, even though he’s in a supporting role. Hard to believe anybody can make Diesel look small, but that’s The Rock for you. Recognizing the audience’s need to see these guys match up against each other, Fast Five features a gritty, extended fight sequence between the two titans. It’s like watching King Kong battle a T-Rex.

Unlike the other parts of the movie. The movie rides on the backs of Vin Diesel and super-dreamy Paul Walker. Diesel acts mostly by tightening his neck muscles and swallowing. Walker, meanwhile, is Keanu Reeves without the emotional range. The movie sags when Diesel, Walker or love interest Jordana Brewster are left alone on screen. It’s a second-rate soap opera set in the middle of a world-class action film. Yes, you have to allow a certain amount of give with this type of movie, but still. Also, why do people continue to hire Paul Walker?

Lin, doing his best to seize the opportunity of directing Diesel and Johnson, crafts an unconscionable film that lacks coherence and plausibility. Let’s face it, this movie doesn’t have to nor does it want to pander to unbelievers of the action genre. Not for one moment does the film cease to impress with its considerable respect for crafting well thought out chase sequences that are innovative. No repetition is occurring here. Our astonishment reaches new heights time and again with each new film that comes along in this long-running and improving series.

Though aesthetics have never really concerned “Furious” filmmakers, the sheer audacity of Fast Five is kind of breathtaking in a metal-twisting, death-defying, mission-implausible, B-movie-on-steroids kind of way. I’m just saying. Go see Thor if you get the chance, but if not, you could do worse than Fast Five.