Who remembers a movie a scant three and a half years ago called GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra? Based off the toyline, it starred Channing Tatum before he was Channing Tatum, Joseph Gordon Levitt just after he really became Joseph Gordon Levitt and Marlon Wayans after having still been Marlon Wayans. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t necessarily horrible (though that was also because it came out after the abysmal Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, so it might be a big candidate for “take it with a grain of salt”). The movie was certainly watchable for a dumb afternoon, though there are better action movies out there.
Despite that, like most licensed property movies, the film made a ton of money and a sequel, GI Joe: Retaliation, was made. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson was added, which is almost never a bad thing. But then the real craziness happened. Slated for national release in late June, it was pulled just a month before then and given a new release date of March of the following year. The reason given was to add in 3D, but industry rumors were that numerous reshoots for Channing Tatum’s Duke had to be done.
The movie has finally been released. Sort of. I was given a chance to see an early screening of it last night. Was it worth the extended wait? Hit the jump to find out.
If you saw the trailer for the movie at 2012’s Superbowl (or anytime after that), then you’re aware of the plot: the Joes are sent on a mission, but the POTUS (who has been captured and replaced by an impersonator) has sent a kill team to wipe them out. A fraction of the team survives and goes on a mission to take out the man who tried to have them killed, along with saving the world in the process. Like the last movie, it’s a plot that’s big enough to fit through a needle’s eye.
This leads us to the first of the movie’s two big problems: it doesn’t feel complete. There are essentially two parts to the movie: the Joe team action abroad that they survive and the ninja-y adventures of Snake Eyes that are chock full of ninja antics, actions and the RZA (that’s not a hyperbole). The first part feels, more or less, like the direct to video movies that you’d find littering pay per view channels and video rental stores all over the nineties. The second part feels like a Tony Jaa/Donnie Yen/The Heroic Trio movie. Unfortunately, both parts end up seeming like too much was left on the cutting room floor (ironic, given the aforementioned reshoots requiring Tatum). Edits between the two are jarring.
The other problem is the lack of characterization. The Joe team of the previous film had 8 members on it, and while giving everyone some background or identity could’ve been slightly daunting, there are essentially 3, maybe 6 members of the Joe team through Retaliation. We know the background of one of them, and Roadblock and Lady Jaye (to an extent) are given some background, but that’s it. With a smaller cast, we could’ve at least had some background for Flint. As it is, all we know about him is that he’s Channing Tatum with slightly longer hair. Along with that, Lady Jaye is essentially Scarlett from the first movie with slightly darker hair and some barely mentioned background. That’s it.
I don’t ask for a lot with this type of movie. I tend to shut off my brain for it. I just want to actually have a reason to care, even just the slightest amount.
That said, there is good with the movie. The action is really bombastic and a lot of fun to watch. The ninja fight scenes between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow are a blast. Dwayne Johnson is, as always, terrific (seriously, have you ever seen a movie he’s in that you haven’t enjoyed his performance?). Walton Goggins (the man, the myth, the Boyd Crowder) is pretty fantastic for the few minutes he’s on screen. For the most part, the costume design is pretty good, with big props toward Cobra Commander’s outfit (it’s a major improvement on The Rise of Cobra‘s The Doctor), though there are some moments when you see the Cobra logo on a pair of soldiers that just made me cringe.
So, what’s the final decision? Eh. Just like the previous movie, it’s not atrocious, but it’s not exactly something you should rush out to see. I saw it in 3D, though the 3D didn’t exactly enhance the movie like it did in Prometheus. It’s a fun movie, no doubt about that, but don’t pay full price. Catch a cheap matinee showing, if it’s at the dollar theater or later on when it’s on home media.