More than meets the eye

Last Friday, the county executive of Prince Georges County, Maryland, was arrested under allegations of accepting bribes from developers.

That’s not important. Stuff like that happens every single day. What is important is this: Leslie Johnson, wife of Jack Johnson, has a magical bra.

JACK JOHNSON then told LESLIE JOHNSON to go upstairs in their bedroom and go “my drawer” (sic) and you will see a “check in there that [Developer A] wrote to me” … LESLIE JOHNSON interrupted JACK JOHNSON and asked if she should take the “cash out of here too.” JACK JOHNSON replied “Yes.” JACK JOHNSON then told LESLIE JOHNSON to put the cash in her underwear.

As the wife left the house, she was stopped by two female agents who later searched her and allegedly found the $79,600 in her underwear.

Somehow, that woman was able to smuggle over 79 grand in her bra. For years, people have wondered about the mathematical translations of a parsec, how Soundwave turns into a 30 foot tall robot from a handheld cassette tape deck, the infinite properties of a bag of holding and just exactly where Optimus Prime’s trailer goes. Parallel universes have only been speculated at … until now. Nerd science has finally been nearly vindicated.