More urgent health advice

As winter approaches, much of the country is already being plunged into unseasonably cold temperatures. We here at SeriouslyGuys would like to remind each and every one of our readers (are you listening, you two?) to bundle up and take care of yourself. Colds can be dangerous.

In Boston, Andrew Hanson’s cold became a much bigger problem, when he sneezed while driving and ended up in the Charles River. Luckily, the water wasn’t very deep at all and he was able to make it safely to shore. The truck he was driving likely did not survive the illness.

We suggest the following methods of staying healthy this winter:

  • Not going outside until March
  • Drinking a lot (because alcohol kills germs, may we suggest a health tonic?)
  • Using this as an opportunity to kick that railing-licking habit of yours
  • Using a condom
  • Not touching anything anywhere

One thought on “More urgent health advice”

  1. “Sneezed?” Is that a euphemism for “licked the last drop from the fifth of Jack D I was drinking” or something?

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