From the SeriouslyGuys Vault: July 17

It has come to this blog’s attention that many of you dear, misinformed readers believe we’ve been at the news game for 5 months. In truth, we have always been THE source for the inane, bizzare, and typographically-erroneous since the early days of papyrus and clay tablets. Heck, we’re tougher and farther-reaching than Opus Dei, the Knights Templar, and Red Cross combined.

To remedy this grievous misconception, we present a new feature: From the SeriouslyGuys Vault.

Saterday, July 17, 1790

Mercantilifm Enventor cashed out

Adam Smythe, who changed Wyrlde Economicks with His Booke, The Welthe of Nations, dyed. His Remaines were shipped to England for finale procefing.

Sunday, July 17, 1938

Headline of the Day (and maybe Century)

Aviation nincompoop Douglas “Wrong Way” Corrigan missed California by almost 6,000 miles!

Thursday, July 17, 1952

Attention Germans

We decoded this message on our original 1890 Ouija board:

“Deutchlund, rejoice! The Beachjogger is born, who shall arrive in spoken chariot to redeem your culture from the dark days of world war and division.”