Seagulls attack people because of ants, study says

Once again, the English summer is marked by crazy seagulls. We told you about gull attacks last year, but it seems they’re even worse now, and it’s all because of ants.

According to a new study, English seagulls are acting strangely because they’re eating so many ants. The weather conditions in England, America’s beta version, have produced a bumper crop of flying ants this year, and they are leaving their nests early, too. This means the seagulls can easily gorge themselves on the insects. Researchers believe the ant-laden birds act a bit drunk because of how the ants react in their bellies, which makes them more prone to attacking humans.

The science is clear: we must wipe ants from the safe of the Earth, or mankind will never be safe.