Grah! Photoshop smash!

Veritable institutions like the Vatican and the White House are on their toes today because Benetton, an Italian clothing retailer, photoshopped pictures of their leaders kissing their “enemies.”

The Vatican threatened legal action, while Head American Catholic Blogger Bill Donohue blogged some, over a picture of Pope Benedict XVI kissing Imam Ahmed Mohamed el Tayeb. Meanwhile, the White House endured some stupid questions in the press room, this time over the picture of President Obama kissing Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez.

All in all, Benetton’s “Unhate” campaign has been a success. They’ve only had to pull the picture of the pope, and everyone else has helped make sure we all know the-damn-well who they are. And all it cost was about $200 for a Photoshop license.

Prove it by taking a shower with us

There are certain sentences that, when uttered, assure the world that you have no hope of ever winning your election:

  • “I don’t have to tell anyone where I buried her.”
  • “Is it just me, or are Laotians kind of smarmy?”
  • “YEEEAAAAAAARGH!”
  • “I’m not a witch.”

Delaware Republican Senate candidate and late night television darling, Christine O’Donnell released a new ad, saying that she is–in fact–“not a witch.” She went on to claim that she is you.

Yes, you. Unless you’re a witch. Then she isn’t you.

… Or is she? Don’t look in the mirror!

A racist southern colonel? Preposterous!

KFC has found itself in an awkward situation after an Australian ad campaign made its way to YouTube sparking accusations of racism from its American audience. Looks like they’ve should’ve just double downed instead.

The Aussie “Cricket Survival Guide” commercial shows a white man in a crowd of cheering black cricket fans. The Australian fan, named Mick, asks “Need a tip when you’re stuck in an awkward situation?” and then hands a bucket of KFC fried chicken to the black fans. The YouTube video had more than 250,000 views Wednesday afternoon and viewers left more than 3,300 comments.

Yeeeeeaaaaahhhhh……..

KFC Australia told Adelaide Now that while the ad could be perceived as racist, it was misunderstood by the American audience.

“It is a light-hearted reference to the West Indian cricket team,” the company said in a statement. “The ad was reproduced online in the U.S. without KFC’s permission, where we are told a culturally-based stereotype exists, leading to the incorrect assertion of racism.

“We unequivocally condemn discrimination of any type and have a proud history as one of the world’s leading employers for diversity.”

That’s some smooth damage controlin’ you got there. KFC Australia is now removing the television advertisement that was being run in conjunction with the Australian cricket season.

Fact and fiction still hard to separate

There’s a new uproar in the world today.

No, it’s not about Obama. That’s so last week.

No, it’s not about Michael Jackson. That’s so Monday.

No, it’s not about Jon and Kate. That’s just sad.

The big uproar is over marketing, that devious tool of the devil. A billboard has been erected (heh heh heh) in Deep River, Connecticut, to help promote underage drinking. That’s a good cause, right? How could you ever think such a thing?! It shows a baby around a beer bottle and a number of empty beer bottles around a teen couple. The madness!

Except it’s an assumption that the bottle by the baby is a beer bottle or that it’s filled. A gross and wild assumption. But hey, that’s never stopped people before, right?

Not asking permission and getting sued: still in fashion

The UK’s Change4Life campaign — which links playing video games with obesity, diabetes, heart disease, and cancer — could draw fire from Sony for using a PlayStation-like controller in their print ad. Legal fire, that is, which — as we all know — is the third hottest fire that’s possible (behind orphanage arson fire and burning Benjamins in front of a hobo fire).

CHUNG-CHUNG.

The magazine ad in question features a young boy obviously not enjoying himself while holding a dual analog wireless controller, similar to that used with the PlayStation 3 and its predecessor. The print warns that even healthy-looking inactive children risk cancer, diabetes, and heart disease once they reach adulthood. Sony Computer Entertainment Europe is currently considering legal action against the ad creators.

CHUNG-CHUNG.

Now, having an active lifestyle? Top notch. Alluding that playing video games is a direct cause of not having an active lifestyle? Not as top notch. Using an ad that essentially equates their product with killing kids? Get ’em, Sony.