As with most things in life, watching sports is better with alcohol. It turns out that here in America, if you’re watching a game, you’re probably drunk.
According to a recent poll of Americans who drink, almost no one watches sports without a buzz. Leading the way are football and baseball, with 84% and 78% saying they associate those sports with alcohol, respectively. These are followed by car racing, hockey, horse racing, basketball and boxing. The soberest sports out there, with less than half the respondents associating them with booze, are golf, soccer, beach volleyball and tennis. So basically, the sports people don’t watch anyway.
Now you have actual data to convince the bartender to turn off the Premier League.
There are people who don’t believe in science, much less global warming. Perhaps they can be persuaded by learning that we can fight global warming and get drunk at the same time.
A group of scientists at the Energy Department’s Oak Ridge National Laboratory in Tennessee (your tax dollars at work!) have accidentally figured out how to turn carbon dioxide into ethanol. Carbon dioxide is a greenhouse gas, it’s the “carbon” in “carbon emissions.” Ethanol is the sciencey word for alcohol–you know, hootch. Of course, these eggheads see their discovery as a way to create cleaner burning fuel for our cars. But what it can really be used for is drinking. Cars emit all sorts of pollution and greenhouse gases. Drunk people don’t, unless you count beer farts.
Let’s save the planet by turning CO2 into booze. That’s a solution we can all drink to.
It’s a well-worn comedic trope that your significant other drives you to drink. But what that may not actually be the reality.
According to a new study, your single friends drink way more than you and your partner. A study of same-sex twins found that those who are in a relationship kind of cut back on the hootch, compared to their single doppelgangers. That means that you’re ruining the fun for your significant other, which might be OK, because that means you can go full steam ahead and know that you’ve got a designated driver.
So if you’re in a relationship and you’re miserable, it’s probably because you’re spending way too much time sober.
It’s August, which means winter seasonal beers are just a few weeks away. But it also means pumpkin beers will be hitting shelves any day now. But it’s not good news for pumpkin beer lovers, they’re running low on pumpkins.
And in Europe, things aren’t looking so good for fans of bubbly. The Champagne region of France, which is coincidentally where champagne is made, has had a rough grape-growing year. Vineyards have suffered from rot, mildew and frost. That means it’s going to be a bad year for your favorite New Year’s beverage.
We don’t mean to be alarmist, but now might be the time to stock up on alcohol, you know, before everyone else cleans out the stores.
Ever get drunk and climb up somewhere high? Turns out we’re not the only primates that do that.
You can add slow lorises and aye-ayes to the list of animals you can drink under the table. Researchers found the small primates have a penchant for booze. The animals they studied showed a clear preference for nectar that had been fermented, over the lower-grade or non-alcoholic stuff.
Scientists say this shows that the ability to process alcohol played a part in primate evolution. That means drinking is in your blood.
If you’re like The Guys, you’ve got two loves in your life: your significant other and your drink — and usually not in that order. Science now has an indicator of whether you two can go the distance. What is it? You both need to drink as you get older.
We’ve all added vodka to a Slurpee or made ourselves a Jack and Coke float. (No? Just us?) But what if you could enjoy a cool treat this summer that also give you a buzz. The future is here.
Booze is making its way into ice cream. Real booze, not just booze flavoring. The latest trend in frozen foods is alcoholic ice cream. You can now even find popsicles and sorbet with significant amounts of alcohol. The downside, of course, is the government. Because the feds are pretty strict on keeping booze and food sold separately, there are a lot of hurdles boozy ice cream producers have to overcome. That makes it hard to find, and possibly illegal in some states.
So, if you find any of these delicious treats, please send some to The Guys. We’re famished.
It’s 2016, and yet for some reason there are parts of the country that don’t serve alcohol, and many of them aren’t even in Utah. And now we know that local bans on booze have a real cost of human lives.
America prides itself on not being the rest of the world. Ask anyone who’s never traveled and they’ll tell you that the U.S. is the greatest country in the world. Raise a glass, fellow Americans, today we are truly special.
According to a new study, the world decided to cut back a bit on drinking, leaving the U.S. to keep the party going on its own as the only country to drink more. A worldwide decline in alcohol sales hasn’t been seen in recent memory, and the U.S. proudly kept such a tragedy from occurring in 2015, as booze sales rose by near 1 billion liters over the previous year.
If the rest of the world wants to cut back on the drinky-drinky, that’s just more beer for us.
One of the worst parts about being pregnant, aside from knowing that one day your genitals will explode, is the months on end of sobriety. Sure, the cool doctors say you can have a glass of wine every now and then, but that’s like having a bite of cake while everyone else has their own slice. Turns out that dudes can also negatively affect their unborn children by drinking.