It’s always seemed to me like the official beginning of summer is a bit off from reality. The summer solstice is June 21, still weeks away, so it’s still technically spring. Meanwhile everyone’s brought out the summer wardrobes and going on summer vacations and such. The beginning of fall still feels like summer, winter seems to arrive for everyone weeks earlier than Christmas and spring, well, who the hell knows. I think we need to readjust the season calendar. If you were busy getting your face recognized on Facebook this week, odds are you missed it.
Get ready for Weiner jokes
By now, you’ve all heard about Rep. Eric Weiner getting caught with his pants down on Twitter. After admitting this week that he did in fact send the lewd tweet, Weiner cried. Really? You send a crotch shot and you start crying because of how it hurt your family? Weiner called former President Bill Clinton for advice. If you’re embroiled in a sex scandal, Clinton is probably not your source for reasonable advice.
Campaign funding by the Sheinhardt Wig Company
Alec Baldwin is a noted actor and Sean Connery impersonator (“Most things in here don’t react well to bulletsh.”), but once he leaves NBC’s 30 Rock, he may be shooting for City Hall. Baldwin said he’s considering running for mayor of New York, but won’t say anything for certain, given that election day is still more than two years away. Greatest. Plot twist. Ever.
The crystal ball is a bit foggy
It was the largest police investigation ever seen in Liberty County, Texas. Authorities descended on a rural home after a psychic tipped them off about a mass grave with dozens of bodies, some of which were children. The only problem was, there was nothing there, and there was no evidence that anyone had ever been killed there. On top of that, the owners were out of town. If you’re away from home, the last thing you want is a call about something happening to your house, but tons of cops going through your home and property? That has to be worse.