Researchers use app for ape love, just in time for Valentine’s Day

When it comes to going soft in the War on Animals, the Dutch want to be the softest. The one-time enemies of nature (they made their own sea) have decided that humans aren’t the only apes that need help hooking up.

Researchers at a wildlife reserve have developed what many call the Tinder for orangutans and bonobos. The app they created shows the apes pictures of other apes doing various activities. The apes then push a button on the screen that best gauges their reaction to it, kind of like those BuzzFeed surveys you keep filling out.

Researchers say they have found that orangutans and bonobos have shown they read others’ emotion through physical actions, and now want to see if the apes will show a preference for certain mates.

The McBournie Minute: Crap smarter, not harder

We’re getting closer to the day when your microwave will need to have its own security system to keep hackers at bay. You’ve probably heard about the “internet of things” or “smart appliances.” In layman’s terms, it’s the idea that one day you can control everything in your house from a mobile device. Sounds kind of cool, right?

Put on your tin foil hats, everyone. (Also, where did you buy that tin foil? They sell aluminum foil now.) A few weeks ago, we started seeing reports that smart refrigerators and TVs were susceptible to cyberattacks, and some had even been found to be sending spam. Scary stuff, man.

But why isn’t anyone looking to upgrade our toilets? Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Crap smarter, not harder

Now you can resign with an ‘LOL’

How many times have you wanted to quit your job, but found you were too lazy to get up from your desk and do it? Do you have a really intimidating boss, and just can’t stand to face him in person? Luckily, there’s an app for you.

The Quit Your Job app for iPhone does exactly what its name says. It quits your job for you, via text message. So now, instead of being all professional about it, or taking time to really think things through, you can be impulsive and passive aggressive.

Unfortunately, Quit Your Job does not have a Can I Count On You As A Reference? sister app just yet.

The McBournie Minute: Bryan McBournie likes this

In the past, I have bashed social media. For all my readers over 35, just go ahead and read “social media” as “that Facebook thing.” I’ve said that social media sucks, well I was wrong. Social media is awesome, well, really only Facebook. All those other things suck, and Twitter is basically on the edge of sucking, too.

I see so many of my friends spend most of their day on Facebook. What they do, I’m not entirely sure, but they sure enjoy doing it. Why is it that I can’t enjoy Facebook the way other people do? I took a while to think about this, and after careful consideration, I know now the reason.

Facebook sucks for me because of you. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Bryan McBournie likes this

The McBournie Minute: iPhones kind of suck

I’m going to come right out and say it: I don’t own an iPhone. I know, I know, it’s shocking. I get that reaction a lot. But it’s true. In fact, I really don’t care to buy an iPhone right now, because they are way more than I, or pretty much anyone else, ever needs in a communication device (though they will never tell you that) and in a recession, they are rapidly turning into a symbol of poor planning.

I look at the iPhone much the may I looked at fraternities when I was in college. They cost a lot, they don’t deliver what they promise and really, you just want to be seen with one. In college, I decided it was much easier if I drank when I wanted to where I wanted to, without having to memorize some group’s history or do anything remotely good for the community.

Plus, AT&T hazes you with big fees. Bryan McBournie elephant walks for no cell phone carrier. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: iPhones kind of suck