Tag: balloon

Creepiness is ultimately genderless

Breaking News: An inflatable giant woman was seen over Japan, which, truthfully, sounds just like another day in Tokyo, right? They’re always getting taken over by things of monstrous proportions: Godzilla, Gamera and–if South Park taught us anything–cows and chickens.

Panasonic takes its camera promotion as really Serious Business because, not only did they have a spokesmodel for the their new Lumix FX700 camera on hand to advertise the new release, but they also turned said model, Ayase Haruka, into a giant inflatable balloon. Reportedly, spectators were both scared and confused by the balloon, and who wouldn’t be?

I lurve me the wumenz, but frankly, I’d be utterly terrified to stand beside it. And that’s not even taking into account it supremely dwarfing me.

…..though, let’s be honest, that’s not really all that difficult.

You Missed It: We’ll all float on edition

Welcome to the end of May. Coincidentally, it also happens to be yours truly’s birthday. Please, hold your applause. If you were busy landing on another planet this week, odds are you missed it.

Balloon designed to float really high does so
French skydiver Michael Fournier was probably a little frustrated when he watched his balloon float away with his hopes of breaking a record on Tuesday. He had planned to break the world record for highest skydive, but then the balloon came untethered and floated away accidentally before Fournier could even get in, much less jump. France promptly surrendered.

Pressed secretary
Former Bush Press Secretary Scott McClellan released a book this week that raised some eyebrows in Washington. McClellan said national security advisers in the Bush administration served the president very poorly leading up to and going into the war in Iraq. He charges the administration of spinning important intelligence and intentionally leaking classified information. These and other revelations can be found in McClellan’s book, Things I Probably Should Have Told You Five Years Ago.

‘Nsync creator now ‘Njail
Ron Perlman, former manager of 90s boy bands ‘Nsync and the Backstreet Boys, was sentenced to 25 years in a federal prison, after being convicted of conspiracy, money laundering and other charges. Prosecutors said he swindled more than $200 million from investors through his business, which began in the 80s. Noticeably missing from the list of charges: crimes against humanity for getting those stupid songs stuck in our heads for years.

Undiscovered tribe found in Brazil
An “uncontacted tribe” was found and photographed by helicopter in a remote part of the Amazon rain forest. The Indians are pictured looking in confusion at the aircraft and even pointing bows and arrows at it. A nonprofit group said there are around 100 uncontacted tribes worldwide. The photographers celebrated the find by dropping iPhones, teen magazines and smallpox down to the natives.

UK court rules against booze, pelicans

When a postman attempted to defend his drink driving (British for “drunk driving”) by claiming he stores booze like a pelican in a balloon in his throat,  the court would have none of that. Instead, he was charged with driving while more than double the legal limit and sentenced to £600 (British for “$1,200”) and banned from driving for 18 months.

So, to recap: that’s one charge against alcohol (BOO!) and one against animals (YAY!).

Image: “Lunch Time” by Neil Gould.