Can you take the cure? All of it?

We’ve got good news and bad news for homophobes.

The Good News is that science may have discovered a cure that will make you less likely to act on your repressed homosexual urges not catch “the gay.”

The Bad News is that the cure is bananas. Lots and lots of dongtacular bananas. Orally or anally. You need the serotonin.

Come fly the fruity skies

There is sadness in San Antonio, today. Citizens will have to make due with ghost riders in the sky, because they will not see a floating banana anytime soon.

Yes, it was announced last week that there will not be a banana blimp in the Texas sky, as had previously been planned. Really, what state doesn’t need a floating fruit vessel? perhaps the most shocking part about all of this is that the banana blimp won’t happen because of lack of funding.

What is wrong with the citizens of Texas, that they don’t want to donate money to make this blimp a reality? Do they not like proper nutrition or something?