We’ve been fighting the War on Animals for a long time. The goal isn’t to wipe animals off the face of the Earth, just mostly so. If we killed them all, we’d be forced to go vegetarian, and there is no darker fate. But now it seems that there’s one more animal we can’t live without: wasps.
According to a recent study, a species of yeast commonly used in making beer and wine can live and reproduce in the guts of wasps. Researchers say that there might be different varieties of the yeast because of cross-breeding inside the insects. Each yeast lends its own flavor to the alcohol it makes.
It seems wasps may be the drunkest species on the planet.
Some holiday magic landed in London last Friday. The bad news is that the holiday cheer is already dried up.
Carlsberg, a brand of beer you’ve probably seen on soccer jerseys, set up a Christmas tree along the Thames River in London on Friday. This wasn’t just any Christmas tree, it came with a gift for everyone: the gift of free beer. For seven hours, Londoners got to drink free beer. We can only assume that this led to other holiday traditions in England, such as throwing up in the street and getting into fistfights.
Here’s hoping for the Christmas miracle to make it here to the U.S.
The LGBT community has achieved a lot in recent years, thanks to a lot of hard work. And now, they can enjoy their own beer after all their hard work.
Oddball Scottish brewery BrewDog has partnered with the organizers of a British LGBT event that is the world’s first transgender beer. The beer, No Label, won’t chang you or anything, but it is in between styles. It’s made with hops that have changed genders (yes, there are boy hop vines and girl hop vines). Further it’s a Kolsch, which is kind of between a lager and an ale.
The Guys are pleased to hear that the LGBT community has a beer honoring them. The beer world is all about acceptance and change. Except when it comes to vegans.
Apparently, it costs more than a couple of cases of beer to get the FBI to go through family members’ texts. At least, that’s what a judge in North Carolina learned after being charged with attempted bribery.
According to the FBI, Superior Court Judge Arnold Ogden Jones was charged with attempted bribery after allegedly offering an agent a couple of cases — y’know, like buddies — if the agent would ignore a lack of probable cause and obtain some text messages for “just for [him].” And who hasn’t asked their neighbor or coworker for that? Violating the U.S. Constitution is just one of those things good friends do, like loan a cup of sugar without habeas corpus or quarter some troops, no questions asked.
Of course, then things got weird because the agent reportedly turned down the beer(!) and asked for $100 instead. Jones should’ve known something was up, because nobody turns down free beer. I mean, cash is nice, but you can’t drink it and, believe us, it doesn’t get you high when you smoke it.
Congratulations, vegans, you’ve won. You finally made everything that was enjoyable about the world crappy enough for you to put it in your body.
For hundreds of years, Guinness has been made in Ireland, and while the brewing methods may have changed, it’s always been with the same ingredients. Now, they’re going to change the recipe so your smelly, greasy-haired friend you wish you hadn’t invited to the party can enjoy it too. Guinness will no longer use isinglass, a gelatin made from fish bladders, to remove yeast particles from its beer. So now you can listen to your friend ramble about the dangers of chemicals in water while he or she gets drunk on the most famous stout in the world.
The only good news here is that this change will only happen for the Guinness brewed in Ireland. Here in the U.S., we can still proudly drink our beer with the fish bladder goop in it.
Everyone loves champagne, but who has the time to drink it? All that sipping and enjoying, meanwhile, you’re waiting for the buzz to kick in. Now there’s a solution.
And that solution is called the Chambong, a cross between a champagne flute and a beer bong. The device is all glass, and shaped like an L. On one end, it looks like a regular champagne flute, and on the other, it looks like a crack pipe. Simply hold the crack pipe end up to your lips, lift the flute end, and enjoy the champagne being launched down your throat.
The Guys were drinking alcoholic beverages that weren’t beer a decade ago, and from a bong a couple stories up. Too bad we never capitalized.
The quality of food offered at schools here in the U.S. has always been a hot debate topic, but it’s worse in Zimbabwe, and not for the reason you’re thinking of.
At least three schools there have banned breakfast cereal because kids are making beer with it. Kids who probably do well in science class mix the cereal, some water, some brown sugar and yeast, and let it ferment. The end result is probably as tasty as it sounds, but at least it contains alcohol.
Remember that time you went home with that girl at the bar, only to find the next morning she didn’t look as good as she did when you were drunk? Science says you’re making that up.
According to a recent study in Bristol, England, there may be no such thing as beer goggles after all. Researchers conducted a study of patrons of three pubs in town where they showed people images of faces and asked for their attractiveness rating, then they measured their BAC. The study was kind of like a drunken Hot or Not throwback. They found no clear correlation between the attractiveness ratings a person gave and the amount of booze in their bloodstream.
Some say the study shows that lowered inhibitions and lower standards could make the drunken hook-ups happen.
General Mills and the Fulton brewery have joined forces to produce HefeWheaties — a slight variation on the hefeweizen, a German beer recipe that is 50 percent made from fermented wheat — that combines marketing forces with the breakfast of champions: little chocolate donuts Wheaties.
Neither company has announced whether they will feature famous sports figures on the cans, but The Guys’ vote is for John Daly and Bob Ueker.
You’re lucky to be a drunk in the U.S. That is, of course, if you’re reading this in the U.S., and a drunk. People who like to bend an elbow don’t have it so lucky in other parts of the world.
In remote parts of Australia, people are using Vegemite to make booze. The spread contains yeast, so desperate Aussies who want a buzz use it to make the Australian equivalent of bathtub gin. This had led to calls to limit Vegemite purchases, which in turn led to a panic to keep Vegemite legal. This is a serious issue.
But not as serious as the situation in Venezuela, where they are slowing beer production because of a shortage of the grains and hops necessary to brew. Understandably, the nation is freaking out.