Some news companies (that begin with an “F” and end with an “X”) have suggested that Bill Clinton freed the two American journalist captives by rewarding Kim Jong Il, that his presence gave North Korea “status and bragging rights.”
Other news companies (that begin with an “A” and end with a “P”) suggest otherwise: he nagged them to capitulation.
Former White House cigar-aficionado, Bill Clinton, arrived in Pyongyang, North Korea on Tuesday to negotiate the release of two American journalists with Kim Jong Il.
The two held “an exhaustive conversation,” which–considering it was with Kim–probably included the following:
At this rate, the two journalists should be freed once Kim and Clinton finish their massages and previewing the littlest tyrant’s drawings of his “missile program.”
Comedians are worried about their trade now that George Bush’s presidency is almost over. It’s been an easy eight years, minus that brief period in late 2001-2002 when we depended on him as an illiterate father-figure.
In fact, things have been so bad for Bush and the gang that Republicans are complaining that we made too much fun of him, ruining their dreams of pop-up history books.
But enough about those oversensitive, feelings-oriented, fairness-mongering crybabies. We’ve got a real issue on our hands: how do we make fun of the guy who’s supposed to save America, especially one who’s … um, diverse?
Did any of you voters think about us? Humorists have husbands, wives and children to publicly belittle; we can’t pay for that unless we do political jokes, too. This is why The Guys held an emergency post-election meeting to determine how to joke about the new president. Continue reading How To: Joke about the new president
NBC has suspended David Shuster for suggesting that the Hillary Clinton campaign “pimped out” once and former First Daughter (at time of this post), Chelsea Clinton.
What does this mean for the Clinton family? Bill’s back, baby. Bill … is … back.
We’re not going to name any names, but there’s a concern that a certain lady running for president can’t control her husband, who was also once president. It’s a sensitive situation, so we’ll call them Hilda and Billfred to preserve their dignity. When Hilda commented that she can control Billfred, it caused a lot of people to wonder if it’s possible to control any husband, much less Billfred. To help you proud owners of men, The Guys got together to write how to control that man o’ yours.
