While we’ve been focusing on the Knut the man-eating polar bear story lately, it’s important to note that there are other animals in Germany. These animals are just as dangerous, not only because they are animals, but because they are German. We all know how it goes when the Germans get riled up about stuff, same goes for the animal population.
No better an example of German animals and their freaky German fetishes is there than a swan love story in Muenster. There, Petra the swan fell in love with a swan paddleboat in 2006. However, Petra was later separated from her unnatural love with a seagoing vessel, in hopes she would find a new mate. She did, but he flew off.
“A zoo statement says that Petra ‘appears to feel lonely’ and is swimming around in an agitated state. The solution? On Friday, she will be taken back to the nearby lake and her faithful paddleboat.”
Not only is this an abomination against God and the natural order of things, but it means Muenster will no longer have its main attraction, Petra the emo swan.