It’s good to be the Sheen

In today’s job market, one wrong tweet or photograph can get you fired faster than Charlie Sheen at an AA sponsorship.

What’s that? Charlie Sheen’s antics with ex-wives, porn stars and kids (oh my!) were in the freaking newspaper, and CBS is merely “concerned?”

It probably helps that he’s currently playing a tamer version of himself on a show that wins awards keeps making money, but damn, actors’ unions just beat teachers’ unions.

Bring your gas cans!

You know what sucks about wine, other than the high prices, snooty people who drink it, stains on your teeth and headaches? You can’t pour your own bottle of it.

Well, that is to say you used to not be able to pour your own bottle of it. In France (of course), they now have machines in supermarkets where you can fill up a container with a tap much the way you would a glass of beer from a keg, and it measures how much you pour like a gas pump. These machines could be hitting stores in the U.S. of A. in a year.

Be the first on your block to do a wine stand!

Put down the bottle when seeking a job

As it turns out, you shouldn’t drink during a job interview.

That’s exactly what science tells us. Even though it improves your vocabulary, American bosses look down on you when you order alcohol while being interviewed–in a dinner setting, that is. If you’re having your job interview in the office conference room and you order a drink, your potential employer may think you are needy. Model workers bring their own sauce with them.

Of course, if you offer them some hootch, it’s certain you’ll get in their good graces.

The barf bags will get more use

The experience of flying is getting worse and worse, thanks to airlines. But there is good news coming to some travelers seeking some shelter from the stress of no meals, small seats, endless delays and frisky security frisks, at least for those heading through Chicago.

Fliers going through Chicago O’Hare or Midway could be treated to the abolition of last call in bars. The proposed plan is to let airport bars stay open around the clock, if they pay more for their liquor licenses. Flying is about to get a little blurrier.

[via Consumerist]

Alcohol: The elixir of youth

It may seem like we champion the health benefits of booze to the point of ignoring its effects on driving. Well, you know what’s (arguably) more dangerous than drunk driving? Elderly driving.

And that’s where booze wins again. According to a retrospective British study, which was most likely performed with room temperature beer, drinking reduces susceptibility to rheumatoid arthritis.

So, you wanna stay young, loose and safe? Drink.

Undying spirits and capitalism

Hard times in America mean for a call to arms for all entrepreneurs. In California, one homeless man answered that call.

A 29-year-old man saw that one of the bars he used to work at closed down. So he went across the street, bought some beer, then opened the doors and made some money. Apparently, the place was doing well until a local newspaper ran a story about the bar reopening and a police detective recognized the “owner’s” face.

[via Consumerist]

The meat lover’s vodka

Do you like smoked salmon? Of course. How about vodka? Who doesn’t? After years of questioning why no one had combined the two, the Alaska Distillery has solved the problem.

Yes, they have created smoked salmon vodka, and it’s part of a growing trend of meat-flavored vodka. Of course, it goes best in a bloody mary, but people are finding new ways to mix the spirit into other concoctions.

Finally, we can order a smoked salmontini!

[via Consumerist]

Wine on the go

So, Great Britain might not be all that great of a place to live, as we have gently pointed out recently. But what about the good parts of England, you know, aside from Mr. Bean?

Folks, over there you can get wine sold in glasses–at a convenience store. James Nash created individual glasses with wine in them for sale, and apparently they are selling like tea and crumpets over there. All you do is tear off the lid like it’s a serving of pudding, and enjoy!

That gives us a great idea: whiskey-in-a-glass.

This time it’s American against American

Henry Morgan was based out of Jamaica during most of his career. He spent his time as a privateer–not a pirate–raiding Spanish towns. Today, his rum dwells in Puerto Rico, but he might be moving to the U.S. Virgin Islands if they have their way.

The two territories are in something of a spat, after St. Croix is offering Captain Morgan a sweetheart deal to move its operations, as well as its jobs, to the biggest of America’s Virgin Islands. This would mean taking jobs away from Puerto Rico, and locals are not happy about that.

Isn’t it cute when two little islands under our rule get in an argument? It’s like they’re going to break out the cap guns at any minute.

Chicago buzz kill

There’s a reason we’re glad the Bears started Rex Grossman in the Super Bowl four years ago. The Chicago Bears, who are most famous for “The Super Bowl Shuffle” and a short-lived SNL skit, have now offered¬†roughly 100 booze-free tailgating spots at Soldier Field for this upcoming season.

This raises the age old question: but if the children aren’t exposed to booze, how will they find out how delicious it is?