A pair of enterprising brothers from New Jersey have … wait for it … launched a line of saggy jeans that clip to specialty boxer shorts. The mooks got the idea from their kids, who had difficulty playing sports and other antiquities from the 1990s before the invention of belts and the Xbox.
How can a mere elastic band hold up the weight of several swaths of denim, you ask? The Davenports are way ahead of you, assuring their juggalo customer base that their elastic was tested on New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie.
Author’s Note:
I was ordered to write this story because I’m the oldest writer on staff.