Tag: calgary zoo

Human meat is grrrrreat!

Stop me if you’ve heard this one.

So, a man walks into a tiger cage … and gets badly hurt. Bad joke? Real life can be that way.

A man snuck into the Calgary Zoo early in the morning with a friend. He then scaled the fence and climbed into an exhibit with Siberian tiger. Because, y’know, that must be a smart idea in Canada or something. Anyone from The Great North know what “Hey ya’ll, watch this” translates into?

People, we’re in a war. If you’re going to turn yourself into a martyr, then at least bring some bombs or something with you.

Knife fight!

We all know that zoos are prisons for the enemies we capture. Better yet, they give us a chance to look the enemy in the eye and know that they are defeated. But like any prison, someone’s going to get shanked behind bars.

The Calgary Zoo got a little tense recently, when a western lowland gorilla (the highland gorillas wear kilts) grabbed a knife and pointed it at another gorilla. Why? Because sometimes your cell mates need to know what’s up. No one’s sure how the knife got in there, but word is the gorilla is now in solitary for a few days until he talks.

HBO: You need to get on a new show, it’s like OZ with animals!