Tagged: Cape Cod

| Filed under Booze News

British continue tradition of drunkenly acquiring land

In 1620, a group of British religious zealots decided to set up shop on Cape Cod because they were running out of beer. It wasn’t the first time booze was involved in land acquisition, and it wouldn’t be the last. In fact, it just happened.

A British man posted on Reddit last week asking if anyone knew the location of a seemingly random parcel of land in Little Rock, Arkansas. He was asking about it, after being told by his friends that he had gotten drunk and bought the land. It was part of his brilliant plan to post a sign with his friend’s face on the land, so that it would show up on Google Maps one day, which sounds exactly like a plan one would make if they were drunk.

Also, being drunk helps make living in Little Rock more attractive.

| Filed under War on Animals

Boston evicting black bears from suburbs

Boston may be home of the Bruins, but it sure as hell refuses to be home to black bears.

A male black bear, who had originally tried to take up residence at Cape Cod and was removed, has now been found and forcibly evicted from Brookline, a Boston suburb. The bear had not purchased or signed a lease in either locality, so this was obviously an attempt by our greatest foe to squat on foreclosed properties.

The next step? Joining the Home Owners Association and forcing everyone to plant ice cream gardens.

| Filed under War on Animals

IM IN UR HATCHERY, EATIN ALL UR FISHES

SG News Flash: It seems a young harbor seal got a whiff of fresh fish and followed the scent to the biggest feast of her life.

Because, you know, living in the sea, they never get fish. Ever. Which is why they should totally eat ours.

Regrettably, this story is neither about the singer or a manly man from the Navy.