Down under round up

Remember the Sex Party of Australia? Yeah, we know, it’s been a very long time, but they’re back, and they’re back with a vengeance. They’ve now begun reporting that the Australian Classification Board has begun rounding up any material depicting women with less than substantially sized breasts in adult publications and film-for an immediate banning. Now, we’re not going to just automatically Godwin the ACB, but, well … we do enjoy snickering when the word “titzi” is spoken.

The reason for this discrimination of the A and A- crowd? The ACB feels that this is a way to prevent pedophilia, in a nutshell. To boil it down, they want to make sure people aren’t turned on and getting all sex-crazed over small breasts, and thus are making sure that all the young-looking women must have really large breasts.

Anyone but me see the basic flaw here?

But wait-there’s more! A burglar broke into the house of the Sciascia family and ran off with an iPod and Xbox. One problem: the legs of Papa Sciascia weren’t exactly up to snuff. The solution? 11 year old Rena grabbed dad’s crutch and gave chase. For 500 meters. The police later tracked down the alleged burglar. Rena’s iPod was lost, but her Xbox was found in a bush near the family’s home. The burglar was never named, for obvious reasons of not wanting to die of embarrassment.

The Germans will invade your farm, requisition your equipment

Sooner or later, it happens to everyone–you’re out with some friends enjoy a few drinks, and one by one, everyone in your group leaves. Suddenly, you realize you have no way of getting home. Some people might call their friends and tell them to pick them up. Others may even stagger around in the parking lot until the bartender drives them home. In Germany, they take a different approach.

A 23-year-old German dude was abandoned by his girlfriend at a nightclub. Not having a car–or a license, for that matter–police say the man decided to steal a tractor and drive his way home. Only thing is, the police caught up with him, as he lead them on a very slow chase. He lead police on for 40 minutes going about 12 mph.

OK, so where are their clubs and tractors nearby?