Science has finally given us the ability to shoot laser beams from our eyes. It’s a wonderful future, everyone.
It’s been the dream of mankind since the dawn of comic books, and now it’s a reality, thanks to Scottish researchers. They have created a flexible plastic membrane that can be put on a contact lens, and can shoot a laser beam when it’s hit with a laser beam itself.
OK, so it’s not quite X-Men level yet. But researchers say the technology could be used for identification and security purposes, kind of like a personal bar code. Which isn’t creepy at all.
You know what’s sad? When Fred Phelps and the Westboro “Totally Not Gay” Baptists make it to Comic-Con before we do.
Phelps plans to picket the world-famous comic book convention because he believes nerds worship comic characters instead of Phelps Jesus. He hopes to encourage attendees to put down the action figures and pick up a Bible, warning them that
“The destruction of this nation is imminent – so start calling on Batman and Superman now, see if they can pull you from the mess that you have created with all your silly idolatry.”‘
Well, Fred, we’ve tried that. And as much as we’ve prayed for Jesus to slap the blasphemy out of you, it’s more likely that someone dressed as Aquaman will finally do it.
So, thanks for converting us over to the church of a comics character based on Greek (read: butt-loving) paganism.
(Special thanks to Matt Staggs.)
A comics thief tried to slip a [unintelligible amount of foreign currency] copy of the X-Men Omnibus into his bag in an Australian comic book store. And he would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for his irrational fear of friendly neighborhood Spider-Men.
The Spider-Man in question was actually mild-mannered comic store owner, Michael Baulderstone, who cannot actually weave a web anytime, yet still captured the unidentified thief just like a fly.
A gaggle of Jedi Knights blocked the door to prevent any escape, presumably via pumpkin bombing, and The Flash stood uselessly by. (Seriously, how often do you need a running guy?)
Police arrived on scene to haul the robber in. They did not have a key to the city to present at the time.
Sure, reading about Batman or Spider-man, or whatever Japanese crap Chugs reads, can be really entertaining, but let’s face it, you can only watch Peter Parker give Doc Ock a money shot to the sunglasses with web fluid so many times. What if–what if we could watch Secretary of State Hillary Clinton give that money shot instead?
Now you can do just that.
Bluewater Productions, a Washington, D.C. based publisher is releasing a line of comic books (most likely one-shots) about strong, independent females in politics. Supposedly, it’s about their life stories. You can watch each woman battle with her arch-nemesis. In Clinton’s case, the vast right-wing conspirators, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin will Palinize the gotcha media, Michelle Obama does battle with her husband’s shadow and Caroline Kennedy fights off reports she is cheating on her husband and withdraws her bid for a seat in the Obama cabinet.
There may even be talk of a comic book featuring Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, which would be a great move, if you ask us. Villains need there own books now and then.
Once again, fanboys, you have hyped the crap out of a movie and thus ruined it for me. I finally got to see Watchmen over the weekend. I’m not going to point fingers, but fans of the “novel” played it up to be the second coming. I was thoroughly entertained, even though the movie was slow as hell. That being said, it’s still just a comic book movie, and those can only be so good. I would rank this one somewhere between Iron Man and Daredevil. (It’s good for what it is, but it’s nothing transcendent.)
My main problem with the movie is that there is very little explained. Yes, fanboys, I know–that’s the point. But you know what? I’m not going back to spend another $20 and nearly three hours of my life to try to figure out some of the glaring plot holes.
Without giving away any of the plot points, let’s take a look at some of the issues I have. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Man watching ‘Watchmen’ checks watch