One ant, two ant, fire ant, crazy ant

Never before has the phrase “the enemy of my enemy is my friend” been more true to our great and noble race than now, fellow humans. Those horrid monsters, the fire ants, have plagued our land for far too long. With bites more fearsome than those belonging to a gnat, their stings even sting the nostrils! Fear not, though, as we now have a new ally … crazy ants?

It would seem so.

Crazy rasberry ants (greatest name ever or GREATEST NAME EVER?) have begun swarming the Texas countryside.

“The good news? They eat fire ants, the stinging red terrors of Texas summers.”

The bad news? They live. And I’m not talking about the Rowdy Roddy Piper movie. Oh, and they also bite humans as well and strangely enough, electrical equipment. So, what can we do? We must eradicate all the wildlife. Remember people, it’s only a matter of time before the crazy ants eliminate the fire ants, move on from electrical equipment to nuclear facilities and become try to kill us. We’re in a war, people–it’s us or THEM!.