Take it from Snee: Be very afraid

When I read that a dead body had been found in one of the Los Angeles International Airports’ bathrooms, I said, “Thank God.”

What? That’s not good news? How do you figure?

I didn’t hear any of what you just said because this is text on your computer screen, but I will tell you why I feel better knowing that there was a corpse in the bathroom of a heavily trafficked public area: he made it.

What I mean is that, when I die, my body will release whatever waste is inside of it. I always figured that meant I was guaranteed to soil my pants, bed or coat closet. But, this guy made it to the bathroom before it could happen. I could make it too.

So, that’s one fear allayed of many. Let’s take a look at some of the others. Continue reading Take it from Snee: Be very afraid

If you have Walter Cronkite in your death pool …

Not Higgins.… then you and Uncle Walter might both be cashing in soon, although with very different meanings.

According to a report taken from Mediabistro and run amok in almost every other online news source, famed news broadcaster, Walter Cronkite, is “ailing.” To translate: being 92 years-old sucks, but to be 92 years-old and ailing is worse (if you’d believe it).

Since he’s a famous person dying of natural causes, we’re hoping he’ll have some cool last words, maybe even his closing line from his broadcasts, “And that’s the way I was.”

In Other News: Walter Cronkite is still alive.