Tag: Everybody Poops

Pa. high school’s new paper currency

Only boys have to sign out toilet paper from the principal of Mahanoy Area High School, once again proving our theory that girls don't poop.
Only boys have to sign out toilet paper from the principal of Mahanoy Area High School, once again proving our scientific theory that girls don’t poop.

Mahanoy Area High School in eastern Pennsylvania has discovered what Joseph Gayetty knew all the way back in 1857: that there is very little difference between money and toilet paper.

After having to continually spend to replenish toilet paper — plus unclog the toilets — due to vandalism, Principal Thomas Smith is now controlling the substance. From now on, before you can make number two, you’ve got to sign out some squares from the school’s number one.

At least one parent, however,  isn’t taking the Great Toilet Paper Requisition of 2013 sitting down: “Parent Karen Yedsena says some students are too embarrassed to go to the office to get toilet paper and are going home sick instead.” This is why the Guys firmly believe that Everyone Poops should be required freshman reading.

[Special thanks for Patrick H. for the link!]

Dropping a deuce may cost you more than a few pennies

We here at SG find bowel movements hillarious. Even the sounds that accompany them make for the best comedy. We also believe in your right to release those movements at any given time.

We all know that everybody poops, but according to Ryanair, everybody may no longer be pooping for free. The British airliner may start charging people who use the latrine for more than the mile-high club. So now when you come out and say you lost a few pounds, you may actually mean it.