Who would’ve thought having a tattooed penis would yield negative side-effects?

On this site, there’s been talk of tattoos throughout the years. This is a story that will not be in the favor of those with them.

A 21 year old Iranian, as 21 year olds are wont to do, decided to make a bad decision. This bad decision involved tattoo ink, a tattoo needle and his own genitals. Having “good luck on your journeys” written in Persian script on his dingle-dongle, no problems should’ve arisen. Except he’s now been left with a semi-permanent erection. That’s gotta be awkward.

Urologists are suggesting that the tattoo needle went in too deep (damning words for the 21 year old), creating fistulas that kept the blood flowing in but not out. Zombie-schlong has refused additional treatment, and it’s been rumored that he’s now going around trying to see how many hats he can put on his body.