The Neo-Nazis may be cleaning up a town near you!
Did that just send chills down your spine? Then shame on you, because at least one branch of America’s Nazi Party has adopted a 1 mile stretch of highway in a Denver suburb.
It’s a win-win situation.
As Doug Neal, the group’s spokesfuhrer, put it, they’ll be seen “doing good things,” much like the sentiment of Hitler “doing good things” for Germany before those things were overshadowed by trifles like genocide and waging a war of global domination.
And, the suburb is allegedly relieved since the previous highway clean-up was performed by members of the Aryan Brotherhood from the local prison. At least these Nazis aren’t convicted felons, right?
Speaking today at the U.S. Capitol to celebrate observe Holocaust Remembrance Day, President Barack Obama said that “it is the duty of the living all over the world to make certain there will be no more atrocities.”
That’s all well and good, but did you ever notice how the atrocity word gets thrown around? African genocide, skiing accidents, muumuus at the Oscar, Gossip Girl being renewed for yet another season: all are considered by many to be atrocities, some universally so.
So, what is the cut-off for acceptable attrocities? Will the ATF enforce poor drunken karaoke choices? Is it the duty of Americans to bum rush Britney Spears whenever she attempts a comeback? Who will keep Wolverine out of the theaters?
It’s a nice thought, but only so practical.
With all the war and genocide going on in Africa, there’s one slaughter that should be happening but just isn’t. That is the genocide of the mountain gorillas in the Democratic Republic of Congo.
Through all the battling going on between the government and the rebel forces, the population of the mountain gorillas has increased in Congo. This is most likely because the citizens of Congo (Congoese?) have been too busy killing each other and not killing the real, ever-present animal enemy in its largest controlled territory in the world.
It can be said that animals rule Sub-Saharan Africa, which for the most part is jungle and wilderness surrounded by human infighting. Don’t you see that’s what they want you to do? Quit fighting your brothers for the throne and go after the beasts who lay seige to your kingdom.
Worms, scorpions and other tiny animals are often found at the bottom of liquor bottles. One animal you can cross off that list is the rattlesnake.
A rancher in Texas was recently arrested after he had begun selling bottles of vodka with rattlesnakes inside them. The idea had been pretty profitable for him because he sold it as an “ancient Asian elixir.” Bayou Bob Popplewell was arrested and charged with selling alcohol beverages without a license. It could mean a year in jail and $1,000 fine.
Not only was this man selling booze to people who need a nip, but he managed to incorporate the genocide of rattlesnakes into the process. He should be praised, not arrested. FREE BAYOU BOB!