Regular smokes aren’t obscure enough

When last we talked to you, loyal reader, about cigarettes, it was in regard to the danger that their new packaging may now be creating. Graphic! So so graphic! And the unheralded racism!

Well guess what, world. It’s not over yet.

R.J. Reynolds has decided to create a flavor for their Camel cigarettes-hipster. Okay, it’s not so much a flavor as it’s a packaging subline for the former Camel Blues, formerly of the Camel Lights nomenclature, but never has the sweet and fulfilling taste of nicotine felt so smooth and pretentious. The Williamsburg Camel cigarettes are being based off the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn, New York, reportedly the hipster capitol of New York.

According to Camel’s very own website, the Williamsburg experience is summed up as being “about the last call, a sloppy kiss goodbye and a solo saunter to a rock show in an abandoned building.”

We can only assume that the cigarettes will taste like ridiculous old 45’s and be shaped like douches, in honor of their target demographic.

’76 a good year for vaccines

Proving they just don’t make them like they used to, it appears that the original swine flu vaccine from 1976 still protected its recipients in the recent 2009 outbreak. 33 years later! We don’t even have herpes outbreaks that last that long anymore!

The best part about this news is that hipsters are finally willing to get vaccinated against the H1N1 virus now that they believe there’s a vintage shot available.

(It’s really the 2009 one, but we acid-washed it and dried it on “high” to shrink and make it look retro.)