You might’ve heard of the news regarding horse meat being found in beef. Grocery stores, delicatessens, fast food joints and restaurants all over the nation have become indignant in their desire for all-beef beef. The furor has even been global, with celebrities and restaurants all around the world (though not as much in France) wanting their Grade-A to be sans-Mr. Ed.
Not so much at Monsu. The fine dining restaurant located in Philadelphia has decided to put the Lone Ranger’s trusty friend (no, not Tonto) onto the menu. Chefs there tasted it on a trip to Italy and thought it’d be a fine addition to what’s already served, and when a ban on slaughtering the equine beasts for human consumption was lifted in the States two years ago, they were the first out of the gate!
How do the Guys feel about it? Eh. We’re not exactly against. In this war, any kind of tactic that assists our troops while decimating their troops can’t be all bad, right?
In the War on Animals, there are certain species that have traditionally been granted a reprieve in exchange for service. Dogs, for one, have been mistakenly classified as “man’s best friend” when we all know man’s real best friend is anyone who will bury a body for you, not just a pig ear. But, another species just can’t make the cut anymore in this day of internal combustion engines: horses.
As part of a new spending bill signed into law on Nov. 18, Congress removed a five-year-old ban on funding horse meat inspections. The USDA stated that there are no slaughterhouses for horses at this time, but it’s only a matter of time before we catch up with Mexico and Canada where they butchered 138,000 for human consumption in 2010.
Although the Guys never stopped eating horse — resorting to even glue — during the past five years, we’re glad that chili con pony is back on the menu.
While SG has covered Second Life before, we don’t tend to cover it a lot simply because it’s just too goddamn weird for this planet. I mean, it may not even be an actual video game, so much as a place to give up your money and then find someone to sue.
The latest one concerns two makers of virtual animals, specifically ponies and bunnies. They’re locked in a lawsuit over who copied whose digital meaningless crap first. One litigant’s demands were particularly cruel, or hilarious, depending on your point of view. They asked that Linden Labs shut down the store of the alleged infringer, which would have shut down the feed supply for the virtual horses, which would starve them to death. Linden said no thanks.
But lo, there is a human victim, a woman who lives in upstate New York who cares for one of the animals in jeopardy. While Linden hasn’t shut down the feed store, that’s still the aim of Ozimals, Inc. which is a virtual bunny ranch (no, not that kind) that claims Amaretto Ranch Breedables, the horse farm, copied its intellectual property. A judge recently ruled that the suit could go forward but did not grant Ozimals’ wish to starve the ponies.
I don’t understand anything anymore. That sound you heard was my brain exploding.
Aye, it does well for landlubbers, but how be it farin’ on the waters? Probably only slightly better than the water-logged commodore of a flying contraption, we’d presume.
So we just got through an election and the first half of Thanksgristmas, and that means I had to listen to a lot of stupid. This is the third time we’ve gone through this, so I shouldn’t have to explain it to you.
And if you’re new here, welcome and try not to get your ass in my foot’s way. Continue reading Take it from Snee: Lightning Round 3 (Hard Thunder)
SG quick tip time, everybody—if you’re ever completely naked while riding a horse (clearly giving new meaning to the term “bareback”) in Peru, don’t use the country’s flag as a saddle. Believe it or not, they frown upon that! Who would’ve guessed? Not me. But then again, I live in the United States. WE WILL EAT YOU.