His believability might not be that reliable

Shaun Winkler is running for sheriff of Bonner County in Idaho.

Shaun Winkler also readily admits his current ties to the Aryan Nations and the Church of Jesus Christ-Scientist (as opposed to the Church of Jesus Christ-Latter Day Saints and the Church of Jesus Christ-Oligarch).

Winkler believes that his ties will not influence his ability to enforce the law fairly and would not be subject to racial profiling.

“Most people don’t know that we don’t just oppose the Jews and the negroes,” he said. “We also oppose sexual predators and drugs of any kind.”

“But if they happen to also be Jews or negroes, hey, awesome, right guys? It’s like a Venn Diagram.” Winkler may have been heard saying subsequently after.

Big Man of the Day Award

This has perhaps been a long time in the making, but it’s now time to unveil a new category: the Big Man of the Day.

It takes a big man to admit when someone has done wrong, and an even bigger one to assert this through force. That is why our first official recipient is Russel E. Miller, who police say hit a teenage boy for not turning off his iPhone on a plane.

For your gross overreaction and uncalled for violence toward a minor in defense of a minor airplane rule, we congratulate you, Self-Anointed Air Marshall Miller!

Also, some honorary mentions for the KBOI2.com commentors who only wish Miller had done more!

Catch Me If You Canada

Frank Abignale Jr. is back!

And he’s not even old enough to drink yet. Which, honestly, is still par for the course.

Colton Harris-Moore, a young man just old enough to legally smoke, is suspected of stealing a Cessna 182, flying the plane and then crashing the plane. For someone not enlisted in the Air Force to do that, that’s fairly impressive.

It’s not all bad thoughts, though. Pam Kohler, mother of Colton, has provided us with two hilariously awesome quotes:

“I just wish he would wear a parachute,” Pam Kohler said.

and

“Now every plane that gets stolen is going to be blamed on him,” she said.

Safety and stereotyping. Those are two bastions of every mother’s handbook for caring.

Can’t see Christianity from up there

From the high-tech SeriouslyGuys Graphic Modeling Office!The U.S. Air Force denied the request for a flyover of the “God and Country Family Festival” in Nampa, Idaho (city sister to Tampa, Florida?). The decision came as a surprise because they’d performed at the festival for over 40 years … until now.

The difference is that the Air Force checked the organizers Web site and found that it’s a religious thing, and spokespeople say they are not allowed to endorse “any individual, group, or organization, including any religious or sectarian organization, ideological movement, political campaign or organization, or commercial enterprise, to include a shopping mall or motion picture promotion.”

But 40 years later? What’s the real deal?

Our guess is that it’s all the airborne prayers and guardian angels. Negative, Holy Ghost Riders, that pattern is full.

Scurry to from Prison

There are two things the U.S. loves to do: run for office and throw people in jail. Sometimes, they are even the same thing (see: Marion Barry). Idaho happens to be one of these states united, and it also happens to enjoy holding elections every now and then.

Keith Russell Judd is a man with a dream. He’s a democrat who finally got himself on the Idaho primary ballot running for president. Though only 49, Judd believes he has what it takes to lead. His name will be right up there will Sens. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.

As it turns out, Judd is currently doing time in a federal prison in Texas, which means legally he can’t even vote for himself. He won’t be out of prison until 2013. So should Judd be elected president, he will not be able to serve his first term in the White House, that is unless he pardons himself.