Here today, gone today

Is there a memory you’d rather not remember? A bad prom? Left at the altar? Did you accidentally fall into a hot dog cart, only to then be chased by a pack of feral dogs in heat?

Prepare to remember them one last time.

Science, that wonderful friend of the lonely, is cooking up a process that will reportedly remove painful memories, permanently. That’s right, el finito. As per the norm, scientists discovered that after removing a protein from the brains of mice, the little squeakers had trouble remembering things like fear.

This could potentially be bad for us. Better start making the test mice dumb, too, scientists.

It’s the best of everything: now we can be like Jim Carrey without having approximately 175 teeth in our mouths.

Take it from Snee: Dickens couldn’t take this

Not Another Christmas Carole would make a great Wayans movie ... for a Wayans movie.When it comes to movies, I can see where I come across as a bit of a jerk. In the past, I’ve accused Roland Emmerich of international terrorism (twice), Harry Potter movies of insidious Britishness and Michael Bay of not understanding the sounds and shapes that make up the world as we know it.

So, yeah, maybe I’m equal parts film alarmist and snob. And you know what? I’m trying to become a better man.

But, then I have to sit through previews for:

  • Another remake of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol.
  • Another unsettling motion capture flick from Robert Zemekis.
  • Jim Carrey embracing his inner Eddie Murphy … and Eddie Murphy … and Eddie Murphy.

All in one movie. (F#%k off, self-improvement.)

That’s right, coming this November, the worst elements of modern film, brought to you by the most repetitive actor in comedy and Disney are going to force you to sit through Charles Dickens’ most boring morality tale, yet. Continue reading Take it from Snee: Dickens couldn’t take this