Score 50,000 points and fly in the military

A guy went from high school dropout to drone pilot instructor in the Army — not a position most 19-year-old enlisted hold, by the way — thanks in part to his video game skills.

Sigh.

The soldier in question was a high school dropout who joined the military to make his father proud (graduating from high school, however, does not do that). But his failing grades in school made his superiors skeptical of his qualifications to be a helicopter mechanic, his first choice. So they asked if he wanted to be a drone pilot.

Surprise, surprise, this doesn’t sit too well with bona-fide academy flyboys. Says P.W. Singer, a former defense policy adviser to the Obama campaign, and the author of “Wired for War,”

“You tell that story to someone in the Air Force, like an F-15 pilot, and they go, ‘I do not like where this is headed. You know, I’ve got a college education. The military spent $5 million training me up. And you’re telling me that this kid, this nineteen-year-old-and — oh, by the way, he’s in the Army — is doing more than I am?’ And that’s the reality of it.”

In all seriousness, it’s great that the kid is joining the military. More power to him if he really wants to do so. He just better remember that the Konami Code doesn’t work in real life.

It took you how long to get around to this?

Tilt to rock out. Set down to sue.Schools, could we get you to file this under “surprised it took them this long”, please? Thanks, you’re a peach.

Yesterday, Konami’s lawyers in the US filed a patent lawsuit against Harmonix (and MTV, and Viacom) in the federal court in Tyler, Texas. They allege that Harmonix’s Rock Band violates a pair of patents Konami obtained in 2002 and 2003, which relate to “simulated musical instruments, a music-game system and a musical-rhythm matching game”. For this unmitigated affront to them, Konami seeks justice.

They also seek cash money.

Loads of cash money.

As well as an order blocking Harmonix (or Viacom) from using technology that violates Konami’s patents. When asked for comment, Viacom didn’t even know they were being sued. Apparently Konami’s legal department is as slow to the punch as their own recognition that another guitar game has been pumping out sequels the last three years.