We could list a lot of things that make people super-ultra-randy and us cringe (to say the least), but we’re a, for the most part, safe for work site. Which kind of negates that attempt on our part.
However, we will say what is an awesome idea: lap dances at halftime.
Horrible fetish: lap dances for only mascots.
Did no one think to discuss the idea with the Duke University lacrosse team?
We know you feel bad about the earthquake in Haiti, and we hope you have donated in some way to the tragedy. There are so many ways to help the troubled country, the New Orleans Saints did their best by winning the Super Bowl, unfortunately, Pierre Garçon, who is Haitian-American, was on the Colts.
Having you considered giving back by getting a lap dance?
A strip club in Toledo, Ohio offered a promotion they subtly titled “Lap Dances for Haiti.” The only problem is that lap dances are illegal in Ohio, so they just charged a $10 cover charge which raised nearly $1,000 for International Services of Hope.
Key quote: “You don’t hear much about strip clubs giving back to the community.”
The relief effort went far better than the strip club’s attempt to help build schools on Native American reservations, called “Lap Dances with Wolves.”