Of course Detroit likes lemon water

The Guys will be honest with you: we don’t care much for Detroit. We’d say it’s not necessarily because of the town, but frankly, it’s totally because of the town. Detroit is a town that evokes the setting of Mad Max and The Road Warrior movies. It’s a war-torn country, despite being a town that’s never been in a battle.

And those were the goods day when the city had money! Now that’s it broke, it looks like a SyFy pictures version of The Road Warrior: emphasis on the car in carnage.

That’s why it only makes sense that when a youngster decided to help out his city’s financial problems by selling lemonade, the city would get right behind him and help him out. Why does it make sense?

Because only something sour and tart can survive in Detroit.

Business venture with a sour taste

Capitalism is one of the things that makes this country rich great. Who doesn’t have fond memories of their first steps into the capitalist world by setting up a lemonade stand without a business permit, locating it on property not zoned for commercial use, selling a product consumers could make themselves, and refusing to pay its employees hourly wages?

That way, you get to learn that you need an investor, and that you really shouldn’t make your friends business partners. But three girls in Georgia were treated to a less-common lesson in capitalism when a couple robbed them of the $130 they had raised to donate to a sick child for medical treatment.

That, children, is the lesson of “never open a business without a security guard or lawyer present, because the bastards out there want to take your money and never look back.”

(The alleged lemonade stand thieves were arrested.)