Tag: long island

I think something might be lost in translation

Keeling Pilaro was a high-school boy playing field hockey on an all-girls team. That is no longer a reality.

“They told me I wasn’t allowed to play because I had advanced skills that I learned in Ireland,” Keeling told CBS 2′s Jennifer McLogan.
Mona Rivera of 1010 WINS also talked to Pilaro, who told her, “They told me because I have an adverse effect…and…but they didn’t even explain what the adverse effect was, so that’s what I’m kind of confused about.”

That’s a very kind way of saying you can’t play on this team because of your penis. Which may have an adverse effect on the girls.

Baba-booooooo!

Howard Stern is the king of all media. Howard Stern is the hero of Brian Michael Bendis. Howard Stern is a species traitor.

A radio listener of Stern’s called in and talked about one of her rescues, a French bulldog. The beast needed an operation, but the woman couldn’t afford it. Stern took to the airwaves and implored his listeners to help out. To which one of them did.

Brenda Motsco, a species traitor in the purest form vet in Ohio, emailed the show about the dog. She then drove out to Long Island, took the dog and went back to Ohio. Did she do the right thing?

Well, considering the category this post is under is “War on Animals” and the animal will be given an operation that will remove a hernia, we’ll just say no.

Howard Stern, we’re disappointed in you. With your outlandish antics, we would have assumed that the least you could do is kick the dog in the buttocks.

Or are you just happy to see us?

Note: the title will require you to click the link. We can be quirky like that.

Nobody likes to wake up in the morning. Most of the time, waking up interrupts your sleep, especially when you’re in the middle of that totally awesome dream involving the Chiquita Banana lady and a pack of velociraptors in Camelot. That’s the worst. It also sucks to wake up because then you have to start your day. And during the winter, having to go to work while it’s still dark outside is the pits.

So imagine how horrible it was to wake up and find a cell phone tower in your yard. Because then you’d be the Di Marco family. The tower, reportedly being put up by NextG, has been rationalized by the company to be put up as the FCC

granted them the right to do so and provide communication service, it was a public necessity.

So, there’s that.

There’s always room in J-A-I-L-O

If there’s one age group that cannot be trusted, it’s the elderly.

Their changing bodies, hormonal shifts and lack of employment to occupy their wandering minds combine to create the perfect criminal.

The latest case of geriatric delinquency comes from Long Island, New York, where a couple in their sixties were confronted by police for committing a Jell-O scheme.

For the unfamiliar, a Jell-O scheme is a form of financial fraud where the criminal buys boxes of Jell-O mix, makes the Jell-O, eats the Jell-O and then fills the box, reseals it and returns it to the store for a full refund.

The culprits reportedly racked in a 100-percent profit of $1.40 per caper (not including purchases made on double coupon days).

However, it is legal in Florida

If this blog has said it once, it has said it a million times: no matter how much your dog may beg and beg, DO NOT let him drive the car. This lesson had to be learned the hard way in Long Island, New York.

A man left his car running (Seriously? Who does that anymore, least of all in New York?) while he went in somewhere (apologies, the story sucks), meanwhile Bentley the dog took the opportunity to shift the car into drive and hit a coffee house.

This is where you would normally find a rant about animals, but in this case, we find we cannot come down hard on the owner or the alleged dog, because the car did hit a coffee shop, which was probably laden with hippies and pseudo-intellectuals who go there to feed their coffee addiction and have anyone look at how important they and their MacBooks are. We’re willing to call this one a wash.

Lest we forget, look back on this fabled video allegory from the early 1990s.