You know, we keep hearing about all these great things science was supposed to do for us, but it sure seems like it’s fallen short in recent years. Personal jetpacks, flying cars and exterminating everyone over 30 are all now 13 years overdue. Basically, thanks for the microwave ovens, scientists, but what have you done for us lately?
Well, science delivered, and it delivered big. Get ready for slimmer, sexier mice, because doctors at Louisiana State University have found the secret to exercise- and diet-free weight loss.
LSU researchers injected mice that they had fattened up with amlexanox, a drug normally used to treat canker sores in humans. The mice lost the weight through increased metabolism, not by moving around more or eating less. Once off the drug, the mice gained the weight back, but it was too late for their young, sexy new spouses to dump them.
The next step is to test this treatment on obese humans, who look forward to getting that wheel out of their living rooms.
Hey, students of LSU! You like being what’s regarded as a perennial party school, right? Well, it’s time to do your academic duty and contribute to that pride, possibly on campus.
Louisiana State University’s chancellor has an idea for an on-campus microbrewery. Solely for academic purposes, of course. The plan is for the building to serve as a laboratory for food science students.
“‘At some schools around the country, they have mini breweries on campus,” says president and CEO of the LSU Alumni Association, Charlie Roberts, pausing to clarify his pronunciation: “That’s m-i-n-i breweries, not m-a-n-y,’ he adds helpfully.”
Mind you, there’s also the marketing purposes of such a venture. Chancellor Michael Martin thinks a LSU-branded beer might generate funds for the school.
“Planning’s still in a preliminary stage, so nobody’s quite sure yet what kind of beer might bear the LSU name. ‘I’m not even familiar with the different types, light and dark,’ Roberts admits, ‘but we joked and said we’d make a purple-and-gold beer.'”
Obviously, the proposal has created quite a buzz among the students. Not that it wouldn’t be able to create a buzz in the students too.