Bipolar cat is bipolar

Like a cruel affront to mankind, like a feline adaptation of a Roosevelt Grier movie, a monster has arisen. The worst part is that it hasn’t been put down for 12 years.

A Massachusetts man, Marty Stevens, has willingly become a species traitor. Not only did he save the creature from being euthanized, he’s even given the beast two names: Frank and Louie. Worcester native, how dare you give this thing an identity! The cat has four (three?) eyes with which to spy on us and two mouths with which to take your life. Do not think that it is a docile animal that thanks you for saving it. Nay, that monster was born with not a genetic defect, but a genetic superfect (that’s opposite of defect [when something is good, not bad], right? sounds good to me)!

Janus cats don’t normally live long at all. With your help, you’ve managed to keep this one alive for over a decade, thus creating genes that may turn things around for the species. Congratulations on helping out the enemy, jerk.