Tag: men’s room

‘Gun-owners need not apply’

We’ve discussed guns in this space before. Americans have a right to them, and private businesses have a right to refuse service to anyone they choose … if they’re willing to make us leave.

Since open-carry proponents’ boycott of Starbucks isn’t working, the our brothers in Georgia have almost passed a law to allow privately-owned guns in non-secure areas of the airport. You know, the lobby to the place where it’s illegal to carry bottled water and pocket knives?

According to one of the lawmakers, State Rep. Tim Bearden, “Posting a metal sign that says ‘Gun-Free Zone’ is not going to stop a terrorist or any criminal intent on doing harm to law-abiding citizens.”

And Bearden’s right. A terrorist could pull a gun at the Delta counter. Or in the parking lot. Or in the men’s room when we’re just looking for a handie.

That’s why we need armed private citizens patrolling our airports for other armed private citizens. And to expedite this recruitment, we shouldn’t waste time with bothersome tests like in, say, law enforcement, airport security, anti-terrorist operations, the ability to use said weapon or basic logic.

The McBournie Minute: Handle yourself in the men’s room

I was rather sad when I saw last week that Brad Pitt is giving out advice about stuff, like men’s room do (do)s and don’ts. I was sad for two reasons: Brad Pitt does not use public restrooms–ever, and I had planned something similar for this week’s topic. What the hell, I’ll do it anyway!

Hang up and aim
We’ve all heard the people who like to talk on/answer their phones while on the can. (Can you *grunt* hear me now?) It’s a fun prank to play, you can even do it at home. But really it’s kind of rude. However, there’s a new kind of rudeness in our nation’s men’s rooms: people who talk on their cell phones at the urinal.

I know that conversation about what you’re having for dinner, or the big deal your office is working on closing, can be, but it is not so urgent that it can’t wait the roughly 2 minutes until you’re done and out of the men’s room again. You ever ride a bus or train and someone nearby is talking on their cell phone? Just imagine that annoyance from the person standing next to you while you are trying to pass water. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: Handle yourself in the men’s room