It’s no secret that the world is in economic turmoil. We humans know it, and so does our enemy. Because they see our weakness, they are now beginning to exploit it.
They are taking our jobs.
A Japanese restaurant (not a Benihana, a restaurant in Japan) has just hired two monkeys as waiters. Yes, we mean it. There are monkeys waiting tables in Japan. Now that your mind is blown, we’ll continue.
While some may find animals serving us as a good thing, if you dig deeper into the issue, you’ll find it is not a good thing at all. You see, these monkeys are taking our jobs, handling our food (possibly spitting in it) and they are getting paid for it. That means if you want to eat, your are funding terrorism, or at least animalism.
But the trouble doesn’t stop there, no. It goes right to the top. Who are these restaurant owners who think hiring the enemy is a good idea? Who are these species traitors? We have a solution for both the owners and the beasts.
Look, we’re sure you’re having a nice, run-of-the-mill morning, so we feel the need to warn you before just launching into this story. The last thing we want is to be responsible for countless asthma and heart attacks — and possibly some emergency pants-changes — around the world.
A new study has found that