What is this, where will Apple insert it?

ANSWER: It's a Turn-of-the-Century Handy Tobacco Churn.

CNET blogger Donald Bell raises an interesting/ALARMING question about Apple’s latest patent application: is this “the missing link” to the eventual iPod brain implant?

Sure, the drawing may look like an old-timey patent circa the cotton gin or filtered cigarettes. But if you look closer (go on), it’s actually a headset MP3 player.

But that’s not all! It’s a Bluetooth headset that stores your media files, plays them like a Shuffle (same four songs, infinitum) and records voice notes and can still connect to your phone, etc.

So, it plays the same song stuck over and over in your brain, records your thoughts, operates your phone and probably undresses people you see on the street.

Sounds like our brains, only with memory.

How To: Throw a par-tay

We all want to be popular, and the quickest way to popularity is to throw a party. Correction: not just a party, but the most righteous shindig the world/your town has ever seen! Some people would say you need to walk before you run, but when did walking ever get your face on a Wheaties box? That is why The Guys are here to teach you how to throw a par-tay.

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