Bound together by the ropes of justice

The economy sucks. Obviously, this is not new to any of you. In fact, the economy is so bad that not even sex is selling. Yes, that’s right, the old tried and true tactic of American Apparel, Abercrombie and Fitch, Victoria’s Secret and Bea Arthur just doesn’t have the same effect as it used to-and that’s being felt everywhere. Work just doesn’t pay-this includes “pleasure entrepreneurs“. Tired of prostitution busts and police harassment that is driving customers away, New York City’s dominatrices are forming a political action committee in order to lobby for their rights. If that doesn’t work, well … let’s just say they have ways of getting what they want.

Hobos score with Scores

Scores is a landmark institution in the New York strip club universe, but both locations are in danger of being shut down permanently because of all the, you know … crime and stuff. Apparently prostitution is frowned on by the law in Manhattan. Who knew? Well, other than the owners of Scores not.

Sadly, what was once a trademark stop for single, heterosexual men has now reluctantly become a lot for hobos to rest their eyes, if for just a bit, as it looks like their liquor license will not be renewed. That’s as good a sign as any for me to avoid the place. How will city hedge fund managers blow their expense accounts on overpriced champagne now?

Don’t they see what he’s doing?

Treymane Durham pled guilty to murder in exchange for a feast of KFC and Popeye’s, “calzones, lasagna, pizza and ice cream.” He received the first half on plea, the second half on sentencing.

Knowing he would receive a life sentence, he also got married in a hurry.

So to recap: he raised his cholesterol so he wouldn’t live as long and got married so he wouldn’t mind dying, both of which will shorten his life sentence the old fashioned way.

This is one smart inmate.

Ad campaign of the week

When it comes to tourism, a catchy slogan is really important. I (heart) NY. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Don’t mess with Texas. Actually, that last one was a slogan the state government came up with to keep people from littering. It was later hijacked by a current president of ours.

The point is, normally, great slogans are reserved for the big guys, the metropolitan areas that can shell out the big bucks to make sure people have not forgotten that they are still there. (New York City has trust issues, which is why it needs Americans to constantly remind it of their affection.) However, the town of Cumming, Iowa has found a slogan that just about everyone can get behind.

You guessed it: “I Love Cumming.” T-shirts are on sale now.

(Courtesy of Katie T.)