How to spin an eclipse on a slow news day

There are a million ways to report on an eclipse. And we thought we saw every last one of them in the build-up to last year’s total solar eclipse. Leave it to Fox News and other right-wing media outlets to find one more: by framing the upcoming lunar “eclipse of the century” as snubbing the United States of America.

It’s important to note that, Fox News did not write the original piece, which was originally titled “Prepare for an extended blood moon” on Fox News did, however, write a new headline guaranteed to force Trump to draft an Executive Order to formally withdraw the U.S. from the solar system.

And, taking a short break from calling anyone left of Mussolini a “bozo,” The New York Post followed suit:

Thanks a lot, guys. Because it’s a slow news day for right-wing media (“no immigration crisis to see, move along”), now Trump’s going to spend trillions so the Space Force can move the moon.

The McBournie Minute: NY Post hates the Irish

Everyone knows about the New York Post cartoon that caused so much controversy last Wednesday. It has angered African Americans across the country. I know what you’re thinking, yet another story about that cartoon. Well it’s not my fault things happen a day or two after my column comes out. Even so, no one’s talking about how this is offensive to my people.

The cartoon shows a dead chimp after being shot by two cops, who proceed to make gleeful cracks about the stimulus bills, as cops are wont to do. This is offensive to black people, according to people like Rev. Al Sharpton, because they have been portrayed as primates for hundreds of years. Plus, a man who is half black just happens to be in the White House supporting the stimulus bills.

You know who else has been portrayed as apes? The Irish. It’s not something people talk about because people don’t want to get our Irish up, but yes, for centuries, especially in the 1800s and early 1900s in the U.S., Irish Americans and Irish immigrants were frequently drawn as a sub-human species in political cartoons. How tragic for this cartoon to come out just before March, better known as Irish History Month. Irish is the new black. Continue reading The McBournie Minute: NY Post hates the Irish

You Missed It: Damn dirty ape edition

This is the really sucky time of year. You’re broke from Valentine’s Day, it’s cold, and the only sports you can watch are those of college (sorry, NHL, you don’t count). We all just need to stick it out a few more weeks until the glory that is St. Patrick’s Day is upon us. So while we’re waiting for that time warp we ordered, here’s something to pass the time.

If you were busy putting out a new license agreement saying you own whatever users upload to your site, then retracting your statement, odds are you missed it.

Oh George, you certainly are a curious little monkey
Like most Americans, Sandra Herold of Stamford, Connecticut had a pet chimpanzee. It was so cute when she got it as a baby. She fed it well, trained it, slept next to it in a bed and even gave it kisses when she left the house. But one day, the chimp turned into a 200-lb. monster. It came out of nowhere. How could anyone see a large, powerful monkey with an owner whose mental stability is questionable be seen as a threat? On Monday, the chimp attacked a woman, nearly killing her. Police had to shoot the monkey. Remember: this could happen to you are your chimp, too.

Sharpton not an ally in the War on Animals
On Wednesday, the New York Post ran a political cartoon making reference to the chimp incident. It showed a dead chimp and two cops with guns, one saying inferring that a monkey had been the one working on the economic stimulus bill. The black community, lead in part by Rev. Al Sharpton, saw this as a racially insensitive cartoon. Because, you know, sensitivity is what we have all come to expect from a splashy tabloid like the Post.

Worst case: One could end up elected governor
A report from the military warned of giving machines too much killing power and autonomy this week. The U.S. Office of Naval Research report says that if we giving killing machines too much automated power, we could risk a machine mutiny and subsequent war against the human race. The report stressed extensive testing before unleashing any new robot weapons into the field, adding, “Dude, that new Terminator movie coming out this summer looks sa-weet!!!”

So I said, ‘You can keep the gun, but lose the monkey!’

Nationally-syndicated columnist Roland S. Martin is upset A good portion of America can’t say enough about an editorial cartoon in The New York Post. Many believe that it refers to President Barack Obama as a chimp.

The cartoonist, Sean Delonas, and the Post disagree with accusations of racism. They believe it’s a tongue-in-cheek reference to yesterday’s news story about police shooting a chimpanzee (hilarious, by the way, because they die just like people) … and the economic stimulus package.

Yeah, here is The Guys’ take on this situation and any others in the future:

Two out of three Elaine Beneses agree.