Jamie Oliver hates the environment, animals

McDonald’s (which is popular on the site today) has caved to British television chef, Jamie Oliver, in what is the latest salvo in his War to Waste Food.

The fast food giant pledged to stop using “pink slime,” a product of treating lean beef scraps with ammonia to render them safe for human consumption, in their hamburger patties. Which means that when the sign out front says “over 250 billion served,” they could mean the number of cows or acres of rainforest consumed by increased cattle-herding.

In the past, Mr. Oliver railed against the use of what is normally considered unusable scraps, including ground-up bone and marrow in chicken nuggets. This led to certain meat dispensaries, including Wendy’s, to start selling “all white meat” nuggets. Environmental scientists still haven’t gauged the groundwater damage caused by the increased demand for whole chickens, whose feces must be managed properly.

Meanwhile, in the factory district just outside town: Oscar Meyer hot dogs are still not made from 100 percent Kobe beef. This looks like a job for … some British TV star!

The persistent wiener threat

We started off the week telling you about how the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile terrorized a Wisconsin neighborhood, so it seems only right that we get another tale, this time in Hawaii.

Apparently, the hot dog and bun-shaped motor vehicle was so ashamed of its Roethlisberger-esque incident, it had itself airlifted to the Pacific island state to get away from it all. But it ran into even more trouble. It seems the phallic car might be in violation of a state law banning vehicular advertising.

The complaint comes from, get this, an environmental group that hopes to ban the wienermobile from ever coming to  Hawaii again. That will probably go double for the bolognacycle.

Weinermobile crashes into a garage, if you know what I mean

It’s summer time, that means hot dogs are everywhere, but mostly on grills. Unfortunately, it also means that the Oscar Meyer weinermobile is on the loose again, bringing with it a herd of sexual innuendos ripe for some snarky news humor blog out there, but we’re not that blog.

The weinermobile was lost in Racine, Wisconsin, trolling for someone to take it in, take it all in. No one wanted to play along. Finally, the hot dog car tried to turn around in a driveway and “accidentally” plowed into a garage that did not give its consent. The weiner ended up getting stuck.

Oh, and by the way, it was a woman driving.