Preventing allergies is a sucker’s game

Who knew that club kids grow up into moms to rave about? The Swedes, that's who.
Who knew that club kids grow up into moms to rave about? The Swedes, that’s who.

Nobody wants to raise the allergy kid. But, sometimes it’s just fate that your kid is the reason why peanut butter isn’t allowed in the school … Or is it? What if you could John Connor that fate, and make it by being as disgusting and lazy as possible?

The Swedes have somehow learned that you can train your infant’s immune system by sticking their pacifier in your mouth before sticking it into theirs. The resulting spit transfer delivers your mouth’s bacteria to theirs, teaching their immune system to ignore harmless elements like cat dander, pollen and other allergens instead of attacking them.

And, if you’re sucking on their pacifier because you dropped ecstasy, you can teach your infant the colors of all their favorite letters before high school.

The Guys in Moms

Mother’s Day is coming up, so The Guys thought we’d dedicate an entry to the ongoing concerns of moms in our sensitively-titled series: The Guys in Moms.

If you’ve been wanting to stick a pacifier in your infant, but have been told not as this could discourage your infant from breastfeeding, researchers have good news: pacifier-use may not contribute to nipple confusion. Despite curbing pacifier use in neonatal facilities, nursing went down when compared to numbers during the freewheeling pacifier days. However, cutting oral fixations out of your baby’s diet also does not curb their smoking.

And, for moms of teenagers: some other mom has assembled a handy list of things for your teen to drink. Print a copy and post it on the fridge to keep your kids from dipping into your personal beer supply.