Tag: paper

What? Kids say crazy things in college

The Virginia gubernatorial race is heating up! Republican candidate, Bob McDonnell, is facing criticism for his college thesis, which the Democrat candidate, Creigh Deeds, has featured in his attack ads.

To comprehensively lay out the issue, SeriouslyGuys will now discuss the story in Point/Counterpoint.

Point: McDonnell wrote the thesis 20 years ago! He says he’s changed his mind since then. Remember how you thought when you were young, dumb and full of liberal education?

Counterpoint: McDonnell was 34 years old when he wrote it … at Pat “Jesus Rides Dinosaurs” Robertson’s Regeant University.

Point: OK, but it was a college thesis–a thought experiment. It’s not like it was his plan for the Republican Party to combat feminism and reinstall religion in public schools.

Counterpoint: “The thesis was called ‘The Republican Party’s Vision for the Family: The Compelling Issue of the Decade.’ In it, McDonnell wrote that working women are ‘detrimental’ the the family; that feminism is among ‘the real enemies of the traditional family’; and that the ‘purging’ of religious influence in public schools is damaging to healthy families.”

Point: Fine. But, McDonnell[‘s campaign] still says he’s changed. He’s now a husband and father of “strong working women.”

Counterpoint: So, not only did McDonnell write a paper that echoes Dan Quayle’s 1989 positions, but he couldn’t even enforce them in his own home?

Point: That’s what women do to a man.

Counterpoint: Touché.

‘This isn’t Vietnam … there are rules’

As part of our ongoing coverage of “Summer is here” — which will continue until mid-October — there’s an element we’ve forgotten: driving around.

For our high school and college readers, this is the time that you and your peers are bored and will drive around, pretending that going nowhere is “something.” For the adults, this means you’re going to a lot of stores with wedding and baby registries.

Without fail on any of these excursions, an argument will arise about the rules to calling Shotgun and Rock-Paper-Scissors (or Roshambo to non-South Park viewers). We’d normally use this as an excuse to write a How To, but someone has beaten us to it and done so throughly.

We suggest sending this link to that friend that calls Shotgun during the planning stages of your Warped Tour trip in August.

Fun Fact:
“The history of calling ‘Shotgun’ goes back to the days of covered wagons and the Wild West. On a trip across the plains, the driver of a wagon would hold the reins of his horse team and concentrate on driving. This left him and the occupants of his wagon susceptible to sneak attacks from bandits and thieves. To avoid this atrocious circumstance it became necessary for one person to sit next to the driver with a shotgun and fend off the enemy.”