Guinness doesn’t care about Japan’s largest toilet, maybe thinks it’s crappy?

Get ready for some time travel style reporting.

Dateline, May 2012: We at SeriouslyGuys broke to you, our loyal audience, news full of not corn and nuts, but of Japan’s decision to make the largest toilet in the world. Women would be able to pay for the privilege in peeing in a clear box. So far, nothing out of the norm for Japan.

Dateline, 2013: The world’s largest toilet is opened in Ichihara. Or is it?

Dateline, October 2012: Guinness World Records decides to pass on judging the world’s largest toilet, citing their lack of interest in the matter. This is a little important for the project as Guinness’s seal of approval is needed for the title. Ichihara cares not, stating that they’ll continue with the costly art project. Meanwhile, male Japanese bladders continue to suffer.

It’s Robert Vietze, not Robert Kelly

Maybe the flight was the remix edition?

Despite what some teetotalers might have you think, it’s okay to have a drink or two before flying (if you’re a passenger). Flying isn’t quite for everyone. Sometimes a little liquid courage is needed, and for everyone that’s imbibed before, you’re aware that alcohol has a bit of a tightening effect on your bladder, requiring the drinker to relieve themselves.

However, and everyone should be aware of this, it is not okay to pee on a young girl. This is potentially doubly so (if not triply so) when you’re on a flight.

It doesn’t matter if you’re on a red-eye flight. It doesn’t matter if you think it’s only happening on your leg. It doesn’t matter if there’s liquid soap on-hand to attempt to clean up the mess. Stop peeing on people.

Urination: A human rights issue

From the immortal children's classic, 'Green Legs and Piss.'Town Hall Participant: “[… In conclusion,] don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining.”

Rep. Pete Stark (D-California): OK. I won’t pee on your leg.

Media: OMG! Rep. Stark refuses to pee on his constituent’s leg!

And then the same news sources ask why everyone’s tone is unconcillatory during this healthcare debate.